Cuttie pie and me!

Cuttie pie and me!

President Pingrees family and I making funny faces!

President Pingrees family and I making funny faces!

President Pingrees Family and I

President Pingrees Family and I
My New mission Presidents family!

I'm gonna cut my hair!

I'm gonna cut my hair!
It's way too hot here!!!!

I'M GETTING MY HAIR DONE!

I'M GETTING MY HAIR DONE!

The Killer Scorpion

The Killer Scorpion

I thought I was going to die!

I thought I was going to die!
SCORPION!!!!!

Jacob and Mallory!

Jacob and Mallory!

Sister Donken and I!!!

Sister Donken and I!!!

Me and my new dew!!!

Me and my new dew!!!

Monday, February 28, 2011

Letter # 48

Thank you!

I love getting letters and packages and movies from my family and Friends!!! Thank you so much!

Dad! You know what I'm thinking....please be careful...I've been struggling with anxiety out here and well, it's been tough at times. This week especially. I've been feeling weird, sad, like something is coming. The calm before the storm is the only way I can explain it. But the work is going forward. The sun is shinning and we've been biking like crazy!

Last week we embarked on a 17+ Mile bike ride to a less actives house for a lesson, and wow! We haven't fully recovered because we continue to bike every day! Ha!!! It was really fun. And sad. We saw a dead dog on the side of the road. Then kept knocking into people that well....let’s just say they were not interested and they live out in the country for a reason! :D It was really great! I stopped my comp and I and we sat on an old liqueur/gas station and I bought us a fudge sickle and waters. mmmm....that was all worth it! A banana chocolate fudge sickle!! The Lord knows us!

We are working hard in finding those that are ready to follow through with their feelings. miracles upon miracles are here on my mission! I love it!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JOSH!!!! I saw all the kiddos and I miss them. their so cute. John HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!! daddy!!! Yours is next!!! I hope you and mom go to the beach and enjoy the green of Oregon for me, because I miss it!!! you don't know how good you got it, till it's gone!!!

Ok, dad and mom! I want you to do something for me for my birthday! and then report back to me ok!!....are you sitting!? ok....I want you to relax and dad it's time for your lushes’ locks (hair) to get cut again and let them wash and massage your head and enjoy. Mom you look SO amazing (skinny girl, I am going to have to work out with you, you need to help me lose my extra 14 pounds) you and dad are both looking great so skinny your clothes are getting too big for you two beautiful people!! :) Mom I want you to spend any money you were going to on me for my birthday in packages and buy yourself 1 new outfit that you feel as beautiful as you look! so you and dad with your new dews and threads can then for my birthday present go to the beach or enjoy yourselves and then end it with the incredible inspiration that the Lord sees fit to help you two incredible children of God listen to as you end your night with a session in the temple, which I so dearly miss and love....NOW I"M REALLY SERIOUS!...I would send you money, but I don' have any. But I know that this is so much more important to me than a birthday package!

Dad and mom, I know that this is important. mom and dad I wont ask how everything is; I think I've been feeling it out here. I can't tell you how important it is to take a step back and breath..." be still and know that I am God..." for my birthday I want pictures of your day and a letter sharing why Heavenly Father wants us to be still and take time to heal our whole self!

I can't tell you enough how much it helps when I know that I take care of myself not to be selfish, but to heal and make myself whole again, so that the Lord can truly use me more. Otherwise, I'm never whole, and God only gets half of me. and that's not what he wants! Don't let Satan make us feel guilty when we take time to breath, be still and know that our Heavenly Father wants us to be happy, and if we're not we need to be still and listen and when we receive promptings, ACT!

Acting on spiritual promptings is one thing I will NEVER delay on. my life might feel like mine, but it is truly a tool that belongs to my Heavenly father to further his kingdom on the earth! And he needs me to be happy and healthy, physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually! I speak by way of a prayer when I say take care of you. it's important, you’re precious; treat yourself how you might treat Christ if he were here. Do unto others as you would have done unto you. I dare say do unto yourself as you would do unto others. Moms and dads have it so hard sometimes, kids, newly weds, new parents, older parents, teens, each of us have it hard, don't try and make it harder for anyone else, thinking that your life is so much more tough than anthers.

John and Joe, Julie and Jed. I need you to know how much I love you. how much I appreciate you. and how I grieve with you when you are sad, or hurting. I want you to know that you are each sons and daughter of God. He loves you, he holds you when you hurt through those he sends to you! I know you and I are suppose to be brothers and sister as well and Tasha, and Josh squash, and Jac and Jill. We are meant to be family. We stick together. Even through hitting john in the eye with a ho and Jac ripping him out of the whole I buried him in and mom running outside with a towel on and me screaming while John is crying blood and Joe gets his arm pit stuck in a tree!! this is WHO WE ARE! I promise that no matter what to each of you. I am going to be there for you. my older siblings and my younger ones. I will all ways be there when ever you need or don't need anything. this is something I have learned. none of us are perfect. yes we have each made mistakes. Mom and dad included. none of us are perfect! so why do we hold each other to such high standards of being perfect sometimes!? we are all in this together "pull it together we can work it out". Satan tries hard to tare the one thing that each of us hold so dear to our hearts....you know what that is? each other....we are powerful! when we are one united in heart and mind. let our goal be one, let our hearts and minds be centered.

Is our main goal in life this? that we as an entire family (sis and bro in-laws included) be forever worthy to go to the temple together?!

If not, why would anything else in the whole entire world even matter?

I pray for each of you. I love each of you. I miss hearing from you! but family we need to pull together especially for mom and dad's sake! they took care of us all these years. now it's our turn. we need to look after them, lift them up, build them up, be the loving arms that they so tenderly wrapped around us when we were hurting, or overstressed. It's our turn. why don't we show just how much power a family like ours has when we truly pull together.

I bare my testimony that families CAN be together forever, the way for that to happen is the temple. we are living in the latter-days, I know we have a Prophet on the earth today, he lives, and the true gospel has been restored in its fullness. Heavenly Father Loves us and he wants us to love those around us, let us not forget those most dear to us which are our family. hold them close, reach for each other in times of need, swallow our pride, start over if need be. I know Jesus Christ suffered for us so that we wouldn't have to. why should our loved ones suffer with grudges and pride when our elder brother all ready has paid that price. was it not good enough the 1st time? I hope our pride will quickly melt away and our family become truly bonded like liquid gold, is my humble prayer, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

-Love a humbled servant of God

-Sister Judkins

From here to home

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

letter # 47

February 21, 2011

1 MORE TRANSFER
:D AHAHAH

I'm STAYING IN College Station for another Transfer!!!! My 4th!! I am very blessed to know that. The work is going slowly, but when you work slowly, and if you are precise and loving and you care so much about what you are building, and if you are moving slow enough, you may notice that your hands that are maybe rough and hard from laboring with all your heart, are changing from yours to our dear brother's hands.

How precious and so real is the love our Heavenly Father has given each of us. A part of him, we are children of God, maybe this is why my heart breaks and tears wet my pillow at night for my beloved family out here in Texas, and why Satan tries so hard to replace those feelings with anger, malice, begrudging feelings that make us feel alone. Satan's whole goal is to separate us from that Love our Heavenly father has for us and our savior has for us, in which he suffered pain and death by such pain-staking ways. Oh the Joy this sentence gives "I know that my Redeemer lives". He loves me....do you know that?

My heart is so full, that my eyes are filled with hot tears as I write to you as I wear my name badge and realize how much our savior knows us. And has suffered every pain we have felt. I have had the burden and privilege to feel some of my brothers and sisters feelings. And how painful it must have been for Jesus Christ to suffer every hard ship and every hurt heart and every abused women and child. "Knowing you'll come home again, is worth the price of pain" my heart aches for those to know the truth, and for those that are still struggling that know and follow the truth. How painful it is to watch their eyes fill with tears because this life was not guarantied to be happy. And some will enter and leave this world only knowing pain and suffering and will maybe even never have a breath that was not painful. Oh how my heart aches to hold my sisters and brothers that hurt because of a beaten and broken heart they try to hide alone.

Our savior Jesus Christ loves us so incredibly, with out guile. He reaches for us individually and although even his closest friends betrayed him, he will never betray us. even when we tell him we will never turn to him, he would take that and I could imagine tears welling up in his eyes, but how he would say "those times when you felt most alone and you asked for me to come, those were the moments in your life when there was only one footprint in the sand, that was the moment I carried you". How often he will carry us, kicking and screaming and cursing him, because we don't think he is there. And every time we punch, he takes it.

"I felt his touch, he wiped away my tears, and with his gentle hand began to silence all my fears." he paid the price of true and perfect love. I cannot say how grateful I am.

We received a referral and went to them within 24 hours. The Vigil family. A family of 6. They are incredibly sweet. And they want to be together as a family. What a gift to know that families can be together forever! The mom is the only one that doesn’t' really understand English so well. They are Hispanic!!! SO COOL! we taught them that night with a member and it was very jumbled, but the spirit was strong and we met the dad later, (who wasn't at the 1st lesson, and he is really catholic, but he was very nice and receptive, and they said they will all be home today for our meeting) They are choice children of Heavenly Father and I'm excited to tell you what happens with them.

The Brown Family (Byron) canceled on us this week, but we are praying he is still hungry for more of the spirit.

We are teaching Shirley again! She is struggling. "I feel that after my husband died that I have no purpose". She has been to church many times, and believes everything, but doesn't have a testimony of Joseph Smith yet. She is truly special and prepared.

We are working hard on referrals from our ward and building and strengthening the ward with each other reaching out and loving each other and serving. To serve is powerful! I hope you all feel that and serve people that are close to you. Don’t forget FAMILY, serve family, they need it just as much as the lonely ward member. Don’t forget each other. I'm sorry to say this has been a hard thing for me to learn and I am so sorry family for not being there and trying harder to love and serve you. Sometimes we forget that our family needs some cookies sometimes, or a heart attack, or a hug and a few minutes or an hour of our time to sit and listen and let them lean on our shoulder and cry. It’s hard that are closest loved ones sometimes get the worst of are attitudes and love. Or lack of love and service.

I love you each so sincerely. I love the work the Lord invites and asks each of us to perform in our lives. I love serving; I love to know my savior trusts me with feeling my brothers and sister and being able to touch them with the spirit. I love the mission of the church! The church is true; it's powerful to know families can be together forever, because God loves us he has restored his power and Scripture to help us know just how we can be together forever! Oh what joy I feel, my heart has been physically pained the passed 2 days with the overwhelming love and trust God puts in his children that are obedient and willing to receive. mom, dad, Tasha, June, Grace, Peter, Josh, Erica, Aiden, Brody, Jac, Megan, Jacen, Page, Jill, David, Lydia, Claire, John, Joe, Julie, Jed, Grandma. I love each of you with all my heart. I want to be together forever. Look at that full line of names and future ones will be added. This is MY family. I want each of you with me, and I want to be with you! The day I see all of us in the temple together for my future sealing will be the day I look at those eternity mirrors and I will see all you with me! Thank you!

Jac thank you for giving me a priesthood blessing before I left to see dad at the hospital. I've been meaning to tell you how powerful I felt your love, and the power of Heavenly Father's words he spoke through you. Thank you for being worthy Jac.

I miss you.

-Love from here to Home
-Sister Judkins


Monday, February 7, 2011

Letter #46

Hey ya’ll

Ok this week is AWESOME!!!

Funny: we found a family!! Totally CRAZY COOL!!! Our lesson went great, we are going to invite him to a baptism soon and invite his kids to YW and YM etc. a family of 5! Pray for SUCUSS just like Amman prayed for, and we WILL see it!

Oh, I was asked to sing in sacrament meeting next Sunday the 12th and I'm excited. I am singing with an incredible lady she owns her own family business too and it’s fun to talk business with her. (Just a little) :) she and I are singing the "Olive Tree" something, the song John's group sang on their CD the 3 girls. Yup!!! Roberta and I are singing it.. She is an incredible singer, and we blend beautifully! It’s going to be wonderful! I'm hoping all our investigators and fewer actives will come and support!!! And feel the spirit! :) YEAHHAH hoo for singing!!! I sing all the time, when I am biking, 2 days ago I sang all day long, my companion was probably like "egh"..."STOP"...I keep singing dad's song "SO CURSE US AND SLAM THE DOOR....TELL US YOU'VE BEEN SAVED BEFORE....."ha hahaha!!!! Hilarious!!! love missionary work!

We've been working with a lot of less active members who are struggling and trying to find themselves,. they are so incredible. I love learning how I can reach out to them and love them with everything that I have. How grateful I am to know what love really is like. so many have such trouble feeling it. Heavenly Father's love that is, and taking it in as truth. Love from our Heavenly Father is what we are all looking for, we want to feel wanted and feel that fire as so many call it. How incredible to see that spark trickle and spark in people's lives. It's hard though sometimes, because you know they are beginning to feel it, but they are:

1. To tired or worn out to do anything about it.
2. Don't believe they are worthy of His love.
3. Or prideful, "I have done it alone once; I can do it again...can't I?"

This reminds me of the poem "footprints" I remember Jill (my sister) when she was teaching YW (I loved when she taught) one Sunday and she printed out this picture of Christ signing "I love you" with the nail print in his hands. I think of how much Jesus Christ has suffered for us his sisters and brothers and he did it because he:

1. Loved the father and wanted to obey.
2. Because he loves each of us individually and wants to know how we feel so he can truly succor us with love.

Why do we fight so hard against God's love?
I can bear my testimony that Heavenly Father loves each of us. we are his kids.

Take a second and think of a child in your life under the age of 8, what do they look like, what are they doing? Playing in the dirt, smearing your make-up on the mirror, playing in the toilet with your watch or cell phone, just woke up from a nap and their cheeks are all Rosy? Think of how they trust you,. how they let you pick them up high off the ground, trusting that you won’t let them fall. How hard is it for us to trust our Heavenly Father, to let him lift us up and trust that he knows the end from the beginning? Trust that he truly does love us, wants us to be happy and that even though sometimes we jump out of his arms and fall and blame him, he still loves us and his arms are open. always.

I have just begun to learn the love Heavenly Father must feel for his children, me, and you, my new ward families in Texas. It's a warm, tangible, sometimes painful heart wrenching feeling that is a constant quest to follow the spirit. How would Heavenly Father have me be to my sister that is struggling, or hurting...help them really know the savior.

We talked in Stake Conference about leaving the 99 for the 1 lost sheep. wow! Powerful, President Monson spoke to me I feel. What's tough, is that the 1 almost NEVER wants the help...because they have been comfortable where they were at, and they are scared to let others in...because you forget the 1 lost sheep had to let the Shepherd pick her up and carry her back to the flock, she had to want to come back and have the courage and submission and trust to truly except the Shepherd's unwavering love for her specifically that he would leave the 99 and come after her.

Working with so many less actives, it swells my heart. I feel sometimes that it's going to just burst. I've never felt this before. a literal feeling of a swollen heart and I am so grateful to feel it. I Love my mission, I love every second about it. I love my pains and struggles and tears that well up in my eyes so frequently and water my pillow by night for my brothers and sister I long to love and share all that I have with. my invitation would be to reach out to those in need, family, fathers, mothers, teachers, friends, no- bodies, or people that feel like they’re no- bodies. "I the Lord have numbered my sheep and they hear my voice."

I love the Lord, my heart burns when I think of my savior's love for us his brothers and sisters.
I love you; I wish I could stay out here forever!!!!!
I love you, I love you, and I love you

From here to Heaven,
Sister Judkins

Friday, February 4, 2011

Letter #45

HELLO!!!

Hellooooo I love it!!!!! Wonderful!!! Ok funny things happen this week!!! Hmm...

1. So my companion and I made a pit stop after tracting at Sonic and all of a sudden, Jared came up and said, "hey I knew I knew you girls"...he sat and ate lunch with us and we taught the restoration to him!! It was so cool because the Lord puts us in the very place he wants us to be to teach his children! He also was at a FHE with a family in the ward. He’s catholic and he was so excited that Jesus Christ came to America and we gave him and Book of Mormon and testified how he could know that it was truthfully a second account and testimony of what Jesus Christ taught during his life...nothing wavering. It was an eye opener to me too. What an experience. He’s single and so we will turn him over to the elders when he has his 2nd lesson.

2. We are working with Jasmine 15, Stone 10 and their mom right now. We had the 1st lesson, but they are supposedly moving out of our ward boundaries!!! :( ....but as of right now we are building so that if they do move wards, that the elders will have a great foundation to build upon and this family will be working together to get baptized and go to the temple. Our hopes are high for this little precious family!

3. We are working really hard with Less Actives right now. Shelton’s are incredible. I met them in Katy my 1st area, and this family is the Green's kids. And BJ incredible women in fact weird thing happened. Evan light-foot worked with BJ, 3 years ago and she has scriptures with his name in them...Evan was in singles ward with me. She was like "what?!" She and I get along really well; she loves my companion and I. just are working hard to build this area so that whoever comes after, will be able to reap the benefits of the building.

4. Sister Fonua and I are doing great!!! We love each other and are working hard to not "cut each other". She loves to work hard and together we will see success with the spirit. I love her example of work hard, plan hourly and always do better. I am having her take the lead this week, so that as a new missionary she can put to action all the incredible ideas she has, and I will just be here to help if she wants it. It's been working really well, she's in charge of starting planning, daily, weekly, nightly, lessons, tracting, pretty much she's the trainer! This way she doesn't feel held back and she feels like she can speak up, and I'm learning to bite my tongue and hold tight to the Lord and the reason we're hear, and not get offended where offense is not meant to be given. Miracles are going to proceed through this, she is growing quickly because I'm holder her to the same standards as she is holding me at, and although it's tough she is learning and feeling less intimidated...she's a great missionary and loves the work and just wants to please Heavenly Father.

5. Oh Sister Fonua and I got into a water fight the other day too, because I was deep in thought with a Less Active that I've been working with for a long time. And she felt I needed to "cool off"....we screamed and sprayed and had fun! Almost as great as Sister Davis and I...but not even as close....we don’t' have a spray gun! Ha! Oh boy....

6. I love you family! I've been thinking about my 3 month plan for when I get home...it's interesting...I love you all with all of who I am and I hope that you are all and each doing well, I can't wait to see you soon and get letters from you. Mom and dad thanks for everything.

I love you all long time....
From here to heaven,
Sister Janna Judkins