Letter #28

October 11, 2010

Family and Friends,

This week was AMAZING!!! I love how crazy things follow me and how Heavenly Father knows his children so incredibly well!!

Ok start of with GUES WHO CAME TO TALK WITH US one of the 7 presidents of the 70's : Elder Costas (He spoke in General Conference) came to our mission and we had a 3 mission conference and he spoke of how we can open our mouth ALLWAYS and teach people and NOT lessons!!!! IT WAS BOMB!!!! He says: "It's easy, no problem....peace of cake to share the gospel in America...." I'm like....ha ha, man this guy is good what does he say....then he continued and said " I just start talking to someone about the gospel and introduce myself as a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day saints and ask do you know about us?....YES they say....."Oh, are you a member?"...no....they say.....'Why not?" ha ha ha!!!! The 400 missionaries there busted up laughing, but my mouth was dropped the whole time....AMAZING this man just asks, why aren't you a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints? INCREDIBLE....I can do that!!!! Oh wow it was so incredible I loved every second of his talk to us. My heart leaped for joy "I can say that?" I thought to myself...I thought I was pretty bold before, but oh no, I was like a little pansy...so now I can really speak boldly and ya know what we tried it!!! when we started tracking I started to ask "oh are you a member..." and instantly they are a little shocked but we have a common ground if not for a few seconds....ha ha wow! They don’t feel as intimidated and they sense that I am not there to force anything on them. Oh I hope that made some sense to you but if not, just know that Sister Judkins has it making sense in her brain!! Ha!

WOW~ I have been blessed beyond measure: an incredible experience this week: Thursday we usually go to a group of ladies and knit and visit with them (they are from all kinds of different religions I love these feisty ladies!!!) and my companion was really excited to go because we'd missed it a few weeks in a row, but all of a sudden I felt a sick feeling and after comp study I told her we are supposed to go tracking, we prayed about a street. MARY JANE LN.....and then got lost getting there and almost just forgot it, when we found it, we parked and said a prayer, the 2nd house we came to a lady was talking on her phone outside and looked at us like we were crazies!! She said "who are you and what do you want"....I’m thinking oh boy, she thinks were J-dubs....I said "we're missionaries" "Oh, she says and hangs up the phone an talks to us....we spent almost 1 1/2 hours there with this women and her sister and they continued to explain why when I asked "how are you' she said "not good" .....She told us her mother who suffered from By-Polar syndrome (a very serious type) went missing on Monday at 11:30PM and it was Thursday! She kept saying wow, maybe you’re supposed to be here, maybe your going to find her and continued to tell us how 2 of her best friends are Mormon and she went to Young Women’s when she was younger and we gave her a BOM and said a prayer with her, after the prayer she started to cry I gave her a hug and told her "it will be ok". They lived in a trailer and her sister has 3 kids from 3 different guys not married and she's 5 months pregnant. Oh my goodness the love the savior has for these two girls is incredible I could feel it. They were worried and trying to be tough and here we are (truly not able to do much of anything) but if nothing else we were there to be the saviors hands to comfort his daughters that were in need. And wow! What a miracle we left our hearts full of Charity and our legs eaten over twice by mosquitoes, but I didn’t' even care, we had followed the spirit and wow!

Elder Costa spoke of following the spirit and not memorizing the lessons, but teaching to the needs of the people.

Last night we had a hard experience: after receiving a referral and setting an appointment for a man named Steve we had a lesson with him and his "complete Jewish" wife. His mom referred him and the wife said the mom is not a true believer, but rather just uses the church because she is in a bad situation. When the wife talked her eyes would look like shark's eyes and her tone sounded deep and load and she started almost yelling at some points. They met us with smiles and set us at the table with homemade cookies... (Oh we had felt like we should fast and I had started to get a very sick feeling in my stomach about 2 hours before we went to the meeting.) What started as a "golden lesson" or so it seemed, turned into them telling us after we shared Joseph Smith's experience that he felt sorry for us....that we were being tricked by a false prophet and that when my companion was crying it reminded them of their son who was led by a false prophet and who almost tore their family up inside and killed his wife 3 times in one week. (How much of that is exaggerated I can only imagine) they continued to put my companion's testimony and the word "Pagan" together.... WOW! We had a member come with us and she was shocked she was actually baptized and sealed just last year in the temple. Her eyes were as big as marbles. My feeling of a pit in my stomach had been confirmed. when we left my companion said the words I just recently said to her with tears in my eyes "WHY?" Why did we have to go there and teach and just let them rip us to shreds and take something so special and trample it under their feet?" And I repeated her same words she said to me, "Because when they stand before the bar of judgment they WILL KNOW...."
The last words I finished with were these to the Rossi's, I asked the wife "have you every really wanted to know and prayed about weather or not Joseph Smith was a prophet?'" Because if you don’t' WANT to know YOU WILL NEVER KNOW!!!" and I looked into her soul when I said that and saw anger. No she has never wanted to know, she says "I know it couldn't be, it's wrong I know he's not a prophet......the saddest part of this is that she will NEVER KNOW....because she will never ask. Just like Laman and Lemuel when they said to Nephi, the Lord will not make these things known unto us....and Nephi says, ye have not asked....If we do not ask the lord will not give. Because that in a way takes away our free agency and that is Satan’s plan.
Our hearts broken and our hope dashed for them and their progression in the gospel fallen, we left and through many tears of sorrow reminded ourselves of who we are and how the Savior of mankind was Humiliated and bruised.....but then Sunday came....when we struggle and are embarrassed for doing what the Lord would have us do, we cannot be discouraged, but rejoice because you shared what the Lord wants us to, and he will take care of the rest.
Needless to say we were comforted by our beloved savior and our hearts are healed. We did leave a book of Mormon and sent him to LDS.org to read Joseph Smith's History.

This week has been incredible and when things start to look good sometimes they fall, but I've always taught what you do when you fall in a race....YOU GET BACK UP AND RUN AFTER THE PERSON THAT TRIPPED YOU....and BEAT HIM! That person is Satan. And we all have power to beat him. We are children of GOD....whether we believe it or not.... we are...and we are ordained with the TRUTH and the Truth will make us free and all those who repent and keep his commandments.

I love you all so much. This week I was struggling. And I can't tell you how incredible it was to see a package and letter from my HOME WARD in Lake Oswego wow! I was letting myself feel a pity me phase of oh no body misses me everybody hates me......ha ha.....and then I get a HUGE PACKAGE and 30-+ love notes from my Primary home family!! and even though I felt like I didn't do a good job when teaching in primary (my little un-experienced self) I felt an energy that came with all the squiggles and letters and hearts and names that spoke deeper then just me saying" Sister Judkins you are a daughter of God, and we are children of god and we support you no matter what!" WOW! Thank you Lake Oswego Primary thank you! I truly love each and every one of you and look forward to the day when I get to see you grow and learn and teach others and serve your own missions! YES YOU CAN! And thank you for letting me know that I CAN TOO! I love you!
and the letter from the Bishopric...thank you, the support that I received this last week lifted my down spirits to heights that tell me my savior knows me and loves me and used his children to reach out his hands to those in need. And my needs were met this week! THANK YOU LAKE OSWEGO WARD! I truly love you so much!
Thank you also to my dear family that never cease to stop caring for me and mom for all the $ you send in giving me packages and bread and everything I need, I feel so incredibly spoiled. And thank you Katie, and dad and the family. Thank you for your prayers I can feel them. thank you to my friends in the WESTLAKE SINGLES ward, I loved the letters I received and I swear there must have been a talk that stated "support your missionaries" or something and they all came the exact days that I needed them!!! Thank you so much for supporting and loving me through all my imperfections! I love each of you and miss you!

Ok I love you! Pray for times to share the gospel teach people not lessons!!!! It’s a peace of CAKE!!!

LOL
Love you all from here to Heaven,
-Sister Judkins