Letter #39

Hello family and friends,

I love you all and miss you dearly and wow this Christmas was incredible!!! How grateful I am we had 2 baptisms and are looking for more through tracting at EVERYONES HOUSE!! Asking for referrals and praying and through my new 2011 game plan that I've already started on because you should never just wait for a date to start something great!!!! :) Ha just made that up right now!!!

1.....HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!!!! DEC 27th 2010
I'm sorry I didn’t' write yesterday, the library was closed and so we are writing today!!! YEEE HAHAHAH!!! Mom how incredible you are I wish I could run and jump on your FACE!!!!!! I love you!!! I'm sending you a special letter today in the mail!!! Very special!!! You will cry.. :) But I love you mom and you’re my shining light!!!

Well I wanted to share with you what I wrote to President today!

President,

Hao and Yao’s baptism was beautiful and they are passed to their ward elders and excited! It was sad to let them go, but I'm excited for their progression!

After my phone call home (which I wanted to let you know was way longer then 1 hour and I'm sorry) but there was something I learned that I’d never really understood before. And although calling home was hard the Lord had bigger things in store for me, and I'm beginning to feel them as I have put my new game plan in play!

So my game plan for the 2nd 1/2 of my mission is this:

1. 100% obedience in the morning schedule and nightly planning (which I've not truly done since my 1st transfer nightly planning, I didn't understand how important it was, until now)

2. Giving thanks to my Heavenly Father for all things all day. (Saying prayers to thank Him for every little tiny thing that goes right.

I'm on my 3rd day of doing these 2 things and I have seen the miracles, one being that my joy is fuller. I have a calendar that I put a gold star on and a paw print sticker and at the end of the month, I reward myself with something special. I know this sounds silly, but I wanted to share it with you because I've never been more excited about being 100% obedient with the things I can control then these past 3 days! And that is a miracle. I know this is what has been holding me back from giving my all and trusting God with my whole heart! I'm sorry I went over time, but I do want you to know that I won’t do it again, and that the Lord had the best Christmas gift to give to me through this Christmas away from family and all, I've been holding TIGHT to my trust in God and faith that if I'm 100% obedient and praise Him in all things then, I am allowing him to bless me, his children that are investigating the church and my struggling but happy family!

President, I felt impressed to send you these short clips of my family's Christmas this year. And express to you the deep admiration I have for you and your wife and each missionary that serves and puts their trust in God when we step away from home and fully carry our Saviors Yoke.

Merry Christmas President.

Love,
Sister Judkins

Letter #38

Christmas..... It's my favorite time of the year!!!!

Mom..... :) I love your concerns for me!! Do you know that!? ;) I am doing better, getting a physical therapist for my neck and back went to doctor and got medicine for my skin (picking up today) my staff is almost gone, bed bugs are DEAD!!!! Merry Christmas to ME!!! Thank you! :) ha ha! Now I am just trying really hard not to get sicker than I already am. Got a soar throat, my comp is really sick, trying to take care of her. NO SWEETS....I'm working on that....mom you are right, it is better not to eat sweets when you want to get better. now if my comp would just listen to me... ha ha! all and all I'm staying warm (yes I bought a new coat (bright red)) I look like red riding hood! ha ha! But I'm staying warm with scarfs and coats and gloves. Thank you! And (I peaked in one present...I took a pair of your fuzzy socks with me to members and people so when I take my shoes off, I'm still warm ha ha!!! Picture it....bright green and blue fuzzy socks ha ha! So warm and yes I know what you’re all thinking..... :) ..."I would."...

Thank you to the ward and family that have sent me Christmas surprises!!! :) I love them...mom I really want to know what is in that little box.....have no idea! : P every time I receive a letter, card or something I scream and get so happy inside, thank you! I'm sending stuff out today! :D

This week has been intense, helping a family move, teaching Rachel and HAO and YAO are getting baptized CHRISTMAS!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAY AYAYAYAYAYAY!!!! They passed their interviews and are really excited to go to the temple and get the priesthood! This week we are having a Mission wide fast starting tonight at 6pm until tomorrow! This is the 1st time in many years that they've done this and I'm so excited to see the miracles that WILL follow! We are fasting for 3 things

1. families to teach
2. the desire to reach our goal next year to double our baptisms of 30 to 60 a month by March!!!
3. faith in our desires

This is incredible and once in a life time experience and we missionaries are excited to see the hand of God scoop up his children and help us teach those that are ready and waiting or searching!

Rachel we met with and she is so cute she was wearing the coat :) she was so thankful because she'd been so cold. and GUESS WHAT....she is pregnant! (The lord works in mysterious ways doesn’t' he) I was worried how we could get her to stop smoking and then she told us she was pregnant and can't smoke because it makes her sick!!! YES!!! (spiritual upper-cut) she also said her baby Loki act differently when we are around. "I've never seen him act like this with people that come over except when you sisters come....and I really love it"....that is so neat to me because that must mean we are doing our job right if little Loki (celestial baby) is acting super happy and jumpy and excited!!! cute chukka monkey!!!

Another tender mercy was Amy is planning on attending church Jan 2nd 2011! and is starting to notice the tender mercies of the Lord in her life ...slowly....but her heart is beginning to soften...slowly....but the Lord knows her. this is VERY exciting for her family!

We are praying for a family this week to find and teach!!! (the number that comes to mind has been 8) My comp and I both had that come to mind...THAT IS EXCITING!!!!!! how thankful I am to have my family growing together in the gospel!! I love the Book of Mormon and Bible and scriptures because they are words of God spoken through Prophets and Jesus Christ and I love praying to know that the spirit testifies of the truthfulness to me because I am a daughter of my Heavenly Father! the father of my spirit! how grateful I am for each of you. Sunday I began to cry when I thought of my home, I was sad and then a tender mercy that was sent from a father in Heaven told me to "be still Janna and listen" a special musical number was being performed and I could tell he was improving! It started with the 1st Noel, then it came upon a mid-night clear....then right when I heard this voice the tune came clear as caroling angels....."We'll bring the world his truth"....tears filled my eyes as I clutched my heart and closed my eyes. I remembered my most prize position my gold and silver and myrrh and frankincense....the one this that brings me Joy no matter what....my family.....a vision flooded my mind of my family singing my last Sunday together before I left "as sisters in Zion and my brothers coming in ringing the good news: "We'll bring the world his truth".....how special, that whole song was just for me! I think of the wise men giving their gifts and I connect my family....if I were a wise women what gift would I give....My most precious?....my family!!!.....What does it mean to give your family? I cannot express to you how it feels, but I can express to you that although it is the hardest thing I've done in my life, we give our best so Jesus Christ and Heavenly Father can give their best to us! What are we willing to give up this Christmas so that we can truly let More Christ in our lives!!! to LET him give us what we need to become what our Heavenly Father WANTS us to become! "The Lord would have me serve in the mission field"...that means he wants me here, and what a better gift I can give than give my Heavenly father what he wants from me. Keep my commandments....if ye love me, keep my commandments. in this there is safety and peace!!!
I love you all and each so dearly and with all my heart!!!

Love you from here to Heaven,
Sister Janna Judkins
p.s. Mom and family we will call around evening time 7pm....(if it changes I'll let you know!) :) I love you! almost time to talk with you ....can't wait!!!!

Letter #37

11 day’s!

Hao and Yao are doing awesome!!! Dec 25th is coming up fast we talked of chastity and wow with them this week and they are committing and doing awesome!

Joseph Choka from Ghana has a baptism date for Jan 15th!!! He works soooo much, but we met with him 2 days ago and he's always so happy to meet with us, he even put off work because he said, this is more important than money!!! Talking about meeting with us!! He's so excited about getting baptized and getting the priesthood too, we might start teaching his 14 year old son too!!! TOTALLY RAD!!! I love missionary work!

My back is killer, but I have another test on it soon, I'm getting electrode or something so we can fix the problem. I was so spoiled in Tomball with people that helped me....now it's tough.....but the work is worth it!!!
Biking is a killer....not really losing the weight that I want to, but that's probably because I got REALLY delicious fudge from mom!!! mmmmm mom!!! Thank you for that package family because I screamed all the way to our next apt. :) and mom don’t' worry I am not opening up anything because I can't...you said please of the letter....ugh....but I love looking at them under our Christmas tree!!! Yes we do have one, infact we combined our pennies and have lights up everywhere and ornaments too!!! :) They make me smile from here to ear and it makes me think of my favorite part of Christmas.

I love this season because it's the BEST!!! and finding is hard and so worth it.

Ok miracle of the week.... story time.....

Do you remember that 16 year old girl with the 7 month baby with dark makeup that can't stop smoking? Ok well we went in for an appointment with her and well the lord worked a miracle with me.....it started 2 1/2 weeks ago when I bought this beautiful black coat with fur around the hood and this special collar that felt like a sweater and nice warm pockets and ohhh....it was the most beautiful coat I could ever ask for ... I wore it every day as my companion and I would bike in the near freezing temperatures ... mmmm ... it was such a blessing......
.......Back to the lesson with Rachel....we were watching the restoration DVD and Rachel had mentioned that she had a coat "somewhere" ....but during the movie I heard a small whisper say: "Janna...give her your coat" ...no not my coat I thought....I don't have another one...and I don’t' have money to get one. plus she says she has one somewhere...."give her your coat" I heard again.... my heart was burning as I stood up before we left and asked "do you have a coat Rachel?”somewhere" she said "do you want mine I asked? I don't want to steel your coat from you....and at that moment the spirit didn't have to whisper again I knew what the Lord expected of me. "Here try it on" I said... she handed me her baby and I took off my coat.... "it looks good...it's warm"....it's yours....I said....the walk out the door and into the freezing temperatures made my heart heavy. Tears began to fill my eyes as I thought about what just happened...I felt sad...for people that don't have, for those that do, for those that have to give up something, and for those that receive something they didn’t' have...I knew that the Lord at that moment takes care of his children...and the way he does that is through his children! this knowledge...for me was a true Christmas gift! ....

I love my savior my family and my gift of life on this earth...."This is more important that money" Joseph Choka our investigator says....he's right....it is more important and God will provide for his children ALLWAYS!!! I testify that this is true and that the Book of Mormon is a gift that Jesus Christ is our savior and is real and will succor us when we stand in need of succor. I Know Heavenly Father love each of us. I know that because right now although I am utterly alone....I am NOT alone. and although I am not home we know where to find "home"....and we know what to do and what Heavenly Father expect us to do to get back home to be with him and our families forever! I bare you my solemn testimony and witness that I know this church is the only fullness of the truth and those who have it....hold tight, like never before. I love you, I love the gospel. and I love our savior Jesus Christ...in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

Love you from here to "Home"
Sister Judkins

Letter #36

Hola Harmano's y harmana's,

Yahooo!!! CHRISTMAS!!!! Mom...oh no don't you dare send it to the office!! TO ME!!!! The last package you sent came and I loved it!! You found the green things!!! :) G-ma used to give to us...but I shut it too tight and now I can’t' open it...but I screamed for 1 hour because I was so excited about it!!! Thank you for that mom and the sun rider awesome and the tea tree oil. I will use for staff infection? Can I use it for that!?


Super excited for Christmas how about you!!!!!??????????

Ok so this week was incredible, we are finally working in our 3rd ward. It started off really hard though because we had to give up 5 investigators to the elders that took our 1st ward and now are praying and working hard to find in this new HUGE area! On bikes...super duper fun....I haven’t ridden out there yet....pray for me!!1 ha ha! We went tracting the other day and it was INCREDIBLE my companion and I were led to a street and the last door we knocked on we ran into a girl name Rachel. She had BLACK eye shadow on that looked like she took a black sharpie and colored on her eye lids. We walked to the door and the person at the door (looked mighty different also...definately could fit in with the Portland crowd) ha-ha! said "are you looking for Rachel?" .....Mum....then this bright eyed young women practically jumps to the front door and says "are ya'll Mormons? I love Mormons".....I was so confused I didn't know what to think. But This was Rachel....so her mom married a Mormon for a while before she met her ex-girl friend...yes I said girlfriend...Rachel says' "she's my mom, and /I still love her." We started to talk and ended up teaching the plan of happiness to her in her backyard as she smoked cigarettes. Poor thing told us she was 16 years old, and has a 7 month old baby boy and is married to a 21 year old. wow!!! Her house was full of honestly it seemed to me like a crazy house with lots of confusion and pretty sure many were shooting up with ....not good things. She was amazing though....her eyes and soul are lost, and during the lesson I asked, "what is one thing that makes you smile when you think about it?" She said without hesitation," my baby..." We explained then how that joy is something she can have all the time and enjoy when she follows Heavenly father's commandments, because it makes us free and happy. She wants us to come back Wednesday...so we're really excited because she'd be in our area and is married so we can teach her!! A real miracle led by the holy ghost.

Satan is working hard to frustrate this new area that we're working in, my companion doesn't ever really get excited or at least she hides it really well, anyone that knows me knows I love getting excited and happy, because it relieves bad feelings. Heavenly Father teaches, "be happy" when he puts Adam and eve in the garden. I love this. You have either two out looks in life....happy or not happy....everything that's good and leads you to believe in Christ comes from God, if not it's not of God. So any feelings other than happiness don't come from Heavenly Father. I think about this....when I'm angry or hurt or offended or whatever...how does that make me feel better....why don't we put away our pride and act as a child would: meek, submissive, loving no matter what, caring, smiling and not letting little things get in the way. I challenge each of us this Christmas to look at a situation we just can't or won’t let go of. a family member, a friend a co-worker, a member of the church, bishop, stake President, me and you.....what is your rope that binds you from being truly happy? .....And act as if you were Lydia or June and Grace or Jacan or Aiden, a little child....What would they do?....Don't they keep loving even when we sometimes hurt them? How is it so easy for them to love and forgive so quickly? Or say, "I'm sad because you...." and why can't we forgive so easily and not hold grudges or hold back, because "they deserve it"....The savior. I would imagine he would not only forgive us but I'm sure he would run to us kneel down to our level and gently grab our arms and wipe our tears and say "all is well....you are forgiven....now let it go....and go in peace...be happy."

Oh a joy this Christmas season. How blessed I am and we all are...for we have the restored gospel that brings Good tidings of great joy!!! You know Gospel means: "good news" and what is the great news we have? The plan of Happiness. so then the angels when they came to tell everyone, "we bring good tidings of great joy" they were really saying.... " We bring you the good news of the Gospel; the Plan of Happiness".....Hey we have that don’t' we....makes sense yes....? How wow and guess what that's all I do all year is I get to share that message with all that I come in contact with....I get to share the gospel of the plan our Heavenly Father has for his children....Who are lost....battered...scared...bruised....broken....lonely.....scared.....looking....and maybe some are on the verge of giving up.....like the old violin....but what happens at the end of that story?... The "touch of the master's hand"....

I have seen his hand in the work...why? Because this IS his work. We're merely tools and if we don’t' perform to our potential we are put through a fire until we are perfected in him. and I know that this is possible. we are not perfect, but the refining fires of God we can be through the atonement and us choosing to Endure to the end.

A special moment happened this past thanksgiving I don’t' think I shared. because I left on my mission. I bought a little necklace...a mustard seed. and when we went through all the trials I personally had to go through I would wear it and hold tight to it, hoping for it to give me extra faith when I was drained....I continued to wear it all through my mission until last week....I've talked of Amy who we actually found her baptism records and she IS a member....I felt prompted to give her something thanksgiving night (we went to dinner with, her parents who had no family w/ them, she was working 80-105 hours a week). I jumped out of the car and was so excited...what am I supposed to give her I thought....then it came...."oh no..." I thought. not that....she won’t think it's as special to me as it will be to her....but the whisper came again and I slowly opened my wooden box and pulled out my rusted, dirty battered little mustard seed....and wrote a note to explain....I sealed the letter and gently tucked my little goldfish-greenish mustard seed in a strategically taped letter. and wrote AMY on the front....I hurried and ran to give it to her parents to give to her and ran back in my apt. shocked at my empty hand....the next few days she called and thanked me....but then Sunday her mom came to me and said this;
"I don't think you know how much that little mustard seed meant to Amy. When she got it she opened it up and with tears in her eyes instantly put it around her neck...." Well we had a lesson with Amy on Thursday and guess what!!!?? Bishop came...and gave her a blessing and talked with her and Amy is meeting with him on Tuesday to start to lift her Heavy burden she has tried to carry on her own for this 10+ years. Keep her in your prayers. She is actually excited for it too. :) AMAZING!!! next step TEMPLE!!!

I love missionary work, even through bed bugs and hurt bodies and sweat and gaining weight, and slammed doors, how I love that little spark we see in those that are truly ready and humbled.....I love my savior, I love my Father in Heaven and I am so grateful to be a missionary and serve. Yes it's hard always....but wow!!!! 2 ways to look at life....HAPPY or not happy.... LIFE IS INCREDIBLE and we are numbered. God bless us every one!!!

Love you forever and always from here to Heaven,

Sister Judkins

Letter #35

November 29, 2010

2701 Longmire Dr
Pepper Tree Apt. #204
College Station, TX
77845

Dear Family and Friends,

I love Christmas TIME!!!!! Did I tell you that!? How I love the music and the wonderful people that are all more joyful that put Christmas lights up and play great songs and sing....I find myself singing on my bike as I'm running out of breath ...but I just can't help it I LOVE this season!!! The time our savior was born....even though it was really April 6th....(thank you seminary) loll!....I love thinking of Jesus Christ and his mother and father that loved him so dearly just like our Heavenly Parents love each of us so dearly that they would do anything for us. What a thought. Do you know our Heavenly Parents would do anything for us if they could? Too bad it's all contingent on our obedience.... :)

OK....Jackie is now an official member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. :) She was baptized Saturday and saw many miracles her father and mother came along with other non-lds friends and her father was red eyed and bawling the whole time. He told her "I don't want to talk about it right now" I sure he was feeling something he never felt before. HOW INCREDIBLE!!! She loves having the Holy Ghost with her always now.

Hao and Yao have accepted a baptism date for GET this DEC 25th CHRISTMAS!!!!! (We are having a white Christmas in Texas :) I'm so excited for them, it's also their anniversary!! They are so excited too!! We had our last lesson on restoration and prophets now and their importance. And the authority. Jessica speaks Chinese and came with us!!! WOW!!! They are so SOLID....

GREAT NEWS....Joseph Choka remember from 6 weeks ago, well we finally have been getting back in with him and he is incredible?....He's been seeing visions of our faces (me and my companion) and said "I know God has a message for me, and I know that you two are the one that are going to tell me"....WOW!!! We went over with a member to give him a blessing and the lesson went incredible about how to feel the spirit. "I feel a great energy within me when I think of the book of Mormon and Joseph Smith and all that you have said to me....I love when you come....I'm so excited".....HE IS AWESOME!!!! And guess what!! He’s accepted a baptism date for Jan 15th. It’s going to be a good ride, but he knows the lord is guiding him.

The ward splitting has been hard, we now have the biggest area (and are still on bikes) ha!!! Oh man it takes 45 minutes one way not even to get 1/3 into our area. It’s huge. I'm asking President to let us be 1/2 bike 1/2 car. Not sure how that will go, but I'm hoping....

WE STILL HAVE BED BUGS>......AHAHAHHAAHHAHAAH!!!.....I got bit all on my legs and mom I need sun-rider!!! PLESASEEEE!!!! It’s killing me....I can't find my other bottle; I used it all the time it was almost gone. Could you please send some more. I HATE BUGSSS.....when I'm sleeping at night I think of all these little red nasty tiny nastiest sucking my blood and ehehhehe!!! ; I pray every night for the bed bugs to DIE!!! didn't get bit last night....at least I don't think I did, maybe I did and don't know it yet.

Loving our Christmas lights in my room. I wish I had candles to burn mmmm...well the work is incredible.....it's going to be a HUGE challenge with this new area so lots of prayers and support from home will be like magical strength to me ;) lol. my companion and I have been having struggles...she hates talking and I love it... you would think that would be perfect, but all those of you who serve mission can feel my pain I'm sure. .... My voice has almost gone out 3 times. I told her she gets to teach and I'll stay quiet this week!! ha!!! No but really any advice...? It's really putting a strain on our relationship and our will to keep going.... and wow do we have a lot to keep going for and do!!!

Well I love you all and miss you....please sent more letters it's hard out here!!! I love you so much and all that you do for me!!! it's almost the best month of the whole year let’s make it count!!! Pray for missionary experiences!!!

love you,

from here to Heaven (home)

Sister Judkins

Letter #34

Family and dear friends,

Thank you for your support and love and letters and e-mails and concern. My heart is full when I think of the love my heavenly father has for me to send such incredible people in my life. Thank you!

I've learned that on my mission over and over. That a broken heart is real, and when your heart is broken...let it break and cleave to the Lord to help you heal. But I was told to come home from my mission with a broken heart...."let it break!" One night I was told as I let the tears roll down on behalf of lost investigators that knew the truth but would not change, and hurt children of God painfully trying to repent and come back to feel the overwhelming love of the savior in their lives and beginning to believe that they deserve that love. With each tear, I felt the pains and sorrows and excitements and anxiousness of those of our Heavenly Father’s children that I have the privilege of serving and in every way that I can, to show them the light that truly brings us warmth and comfort and invite the holy ghost, so they through the holy ghost can be taught and truly converted.

This week has been the hardest of my mission, my heart has broken over and over again....I'm learning to "let it break"...the savior's heart breaks every day for us that feel hurt or lost or overwhelmed. He knows how to heal the broken hearted. Infact he asks us to have a broken heart and contrite spirit. Never in my life have I truly known what that meant until now. Now I have just a little taste of what a broken heart truly feels like.

1st I will start with Hakyu Lee. He didn't pass his 1st interview for his baptism. The baptism was planned and people were upset trying to make it work. Then I find out he has to be interviewed by President Hansen who is 1 1/2 hours away and Hakyu is leaving for Korea in less then 24 hours. You can imagine my stress. I called and scheduled and talked to President and 1st miracle he was coming up for stake conference and would be there that night. Hakyu had an important meeting till 9pm....I called president and he said if he's there right at 9, he'll interview him. Somehow Hakyu got there, you see he walks because he doesn't have a car, and he got there and when he arrived I saw his heart and his want for this baptism to go through, and all though he cannot express his feeling in English very well, my heart was for an instant connected with his. I could feel his broken heart knowing that his baptism was canceled that morning and he was so close to losing the chance. When he walked out of the interview as I waited with Sister Hansen anxiously waiting, I saw the broken heart....President turned to me who is now extremely worried. handed me the baptism record and said "looks like you have a baptism to plan tomorrow".....My heart leaped, my hand clasped his and ran to Hakyu, his heart still broken to think how close he was to not being able to get baptized. I shook his hand and asked "how do you feel" pointing to my heart...."his face solemn, his hand went to his heart and he nodded his head...."good"...in his broken English, he said.

I frantically started running everywhere to get all my signatures....2nd miracle everyone that I needed signatures from was there at the church where the interview took place. Bishop, President, and Hakyu Lee. I made phone calls and asked Brother Sharp to get up at 8am in the morning and fill the font. His baptism needs to be at 9 am....(It was 9:48 pm when that was said) ok I said "10 hours till the dunking" I can do that....3rd miracle....IT HAPPENED....and was the most beautiful baptism I've seen yet. We had stake conference at 10 so the baptism was quick and to the point. songs, music, bishop said some words, baptism (in Korean, so incredible to hear and feel the same spirit.) waited with music, Bro Johnson (our ward mission leader said some words) gift of the holy ghost in Korean. and then final song and prayer and it were done…. INCREDIBLE. President Hansen and Sister Hansen also came to the baptism and mentioned it in stake conference...it was wonderful and all the stress and broken heartedness I had felt all week were washed away when Hakyu was lifted out of the water and tears filled his eyes....I said "this is why my heart was broken, this is why we do this God given work".....

It's incredible how the lord makes us who we are because he needs us and our individual talents to further his kingdom, and as we progress working for him he wants to spoil us! He wants to give us all that he has, just like any dad whose child is obedient. If we love God we keep his commandments. If we Love.....wow! .....how much I've learned and continue to learn through Heavenly Father and his children. the gospel is true, I can't say it enough. It heals hearts, it mends wounds, it STRENGHTENS HOMES AND FAMILIES! it makes us HAPPY!

I know my savior lives, and his heart breaks for us each time ours does, he cries with each mother and father that kneel at their bed hands clasped tight praying for their lost lambs. I can imagine our Heavenly parents do that every night for us (their lost lambs at times) are we all not beggars? I know I am far from perfect, far from the best I can be, but I KNOW that through the Power of God and his son's atoning sacrifice that we as children of God can someday be perfect to live as families in heaven with our heavenly parents and families. the spirit whispers truths to us everyday of our potential....but how many of us are too busy to listen? .... My prayer is that when the spirit speaks we listen and follow and even if it breaks our hearts....yes....let it break....that is a promise I intend on keeping my dear family and friends that when I walk on that plane and am coming back home to .... let it break....Oh how I love each of you with all my heart and our savior, for I know he is with me because I can feel him. I know these things are true, and I say them with all of me in Jesus' name, Amen.

love you from here to Heaven
- Sister Judkins

P.S.

1. Jackie is getting baptized Nov 27 Saturday in Austin, she's excited and doing well. She is incredible and will do much good.

2. Hao and yao are amazing we met with them Saturday with an incredible member: Jessica Beahling who served her mission in China and speaks and connects with them very well! they also came to church the 4th time and said they decided that they BOTH want to get baptized together, Dec 25th! CHRISTMAS DAY!!! Jessica said "well some people might not be able to come" they said that's ok, we know we want to do that because our wedding anniversary is Dec 25th and we feel that is right and are excited for it." I'm ecstatic for them and to see them learn and grow more as we continue teaching!

3. Amy Wolfgang we met with and we didn't have a member with us....she needs one with out a doubt, I feel strongly with her, there is something very special and I know that the adversary is going to work incredibly hard on her!!! and me! I have felt it this week!

I know that miracles are right around the corner, it's only hard when you don't have a map to tell you exactly where and what to do! But I KNOW MIRACLES and OPPOSITION and then more MIRALCES are coming. I can feel it with every inch of me....I don't know what's going to happen, but God does and that's good enough for me. I'll do what HE asks!!! I trust him with all of my broken heart, for my heart truly has been broken over and over...what a blessing.

-Sister Judkins

Letter # 33

2710 Longmire Dr Apt #204
College Station, TX
77845

Hello..........

WOW!!!.............

THE WARD SPLIT Sunday!!!
This was so hard for the ward of 500 members to split and have the faith to follow the priesthood leadership of furthering the kingdom of God on the earth, there were many tears and friends holding each other as they sobbed. The fellowship that I've felt in this ward has been tremendous! And I felt like a little piece of me was being taken too, it's incredible how much love you can have for people in such a short amount of time. And how the lord takes each of those moments and teaches us with those special people. I love the lord, isn't he amazing...yes he is and he's also our father so doesn't that make us amazing also!? YES! It does. We will do whatever the lord wants. The split was hard, but the spirit strengthens those who need it. I KNOW miracles will happen in the coming up months.

1. Hau Kayo Lee baptism Nov 20th....

2. Jackie baptism Nov 27th. She called today and said that her grandparents are taking the lessons also!!! WOW!!!! Amazing!! Her parents said that they are going to support her and come to her baptism!! YA! Great joy! She is doing well,

3. Hao and Yao want to get baptized at Christmas! We took a member with us that spoke Chinese, and taught the plan and that went over AWESOME!!! They are together now with the decision to be baptized! This is HUGE!!!

4. AMY!!!.....WOW! This is an incredible daughter of God. And the love Heavenly father has for her I can feel so strongly each time I'm with her. She was ex-communicated 10 years ago, she felt great anger and judgment from members of the church for years and every time she saw missionaries she would bolt out the door! She picked us up for dinner on Friday and "I just felt comfortable with you" she said. And explained that she wants to be with her family and come back to church! WOW! She is so special. We had our 1st lesson the next night and have the 2nd tonight! She said she wants to take the lessons 1st and then pray to take the steps she needs to take!!! When I 1st saw her I was overcome with a power from heaven as to how special this lost lamb is to our Heavenly father.

5. Bill is Amy's sister-in-laws ex-husband (did you get that) well he just tolled Amy’s sister in-law that he wants to have the happiness he sees in their family and he tolled them he wanted to take the discussions also! WOW! Haven’t met with him yet!! Hoping to follow up tonight!

Things are really happening....the split in the ward was tough, but God knows the way to be happy! True Happiness eternal happiness!

Sister Cramer and I are good, we are working hard to organize and prioritize and follow up and only be led by the spirit, and follow its whispers. We know we are protected when we follow the spirit! this week we took Jackie with us to contact 2 referrals we had gotten from a member and as we were driving out, the spirit whispered to me "no, it's the wrong time....leave" we were parked in front of the house and it was dark (out in the boonies) I said we need to pray and ask if we should be at this house 1st. we prayed and I felt sister Cramer was to get the answer.( she has a hard time recognizing what the spirit tells her and when it's the spirit or just her. its something she has grown so much since I've known her). "I think we're supposed to go the other house"....Jackie said "me too, I felt like the moment I turned on this street." WOW! Then we went to the other house and felt we were not supposed to go to them either. We called that a recognizing the spirit 101 test for Jackie (being an almost new member) and for us too. It was cool. Because the next week we were invited to Leadership Council with President and the other leaders of the mission, and were taught to "drop everything" when you get a referral, treat it like gold. So the next week we followed the spirit and tried those contacts again and with each house (after multiple tries) we actually caught both families outside when we dropped by. And one of the families is interested. WOW! God's children are so important and he loves them!

I feel peace, I know the work we do is God's and as long as our feet keep moving miracles will happen! Mountains will move, lost lambs will hear their saviors’ voice and know that they DO belong with him. Oh how I know this is true! It's the trials that build us to heights we can't see!

I have seen on my mission that the Lord doesn't think that I'm perfect!???....WHAT....really? ....why not....you may ask because I know you are all just shocked...sister Judkins isn't perfect NOOO! How will you sleep tonight!ha very funny! No but really on my mission I have faced major trial and trial of things that I need to be purged and hammered out in. and wow!! Do I feel the bruises of being hammered out physically and spiritually!

after receiving the exciting news about Amy we were riding out bikes home and I was talking on the phone and riding my bike in the dark all at the same time ......pause for affect.....I proceeded to tell this to my trainer who I was one the phone with saying, and I quote: "hey guess what, I'm riding my bike and talking on the phone at the same ---HAHAHAHHAHAH".....well I hit a curb hard and flipped over my bike, threw the phone with my trainer talking on it the bike flipped over me, I smashed my helmet (on my head) into the concrete and I did the tango with the bike landing on my side the bike smashing on my already bruised body! :( OUCH....I reached for the phone and hung it up quickly and with out any other impulse started laughing hysterically!!! I creaked all the way home with my tweaked bike, sister Cramer said "hey you must be lucky, you sound like a cricket!" ha ha!! We laughed and I hurt!!!

I am now bruised everywhere! I will send pictures!!! It’s not THAT bad!!...but it has been fun to watch my bruises go from red, to purple to green to yellow to UGHGH....gross....Hilarious I know!!!

Mom, I haven’t gotten the package yet!!??? I hope I gave you the right address!

2710 Longmire Dr Apt #204
College Station, TX
77845

Ok, will fun week! I love you all and miss you so much! I can't wait for Christmas when I get to be serving and how wonderfully humbled I will imagine it will be!! WHAT A BLESSING!!! I LOVE YOU!!!

p.s. guess what....I get to talk to you in less then 40 days!!! :) love you!

-Sister Judkins
The work goes on in Collage Station 1st and the new 3rd ward!!!

Letter #32

FAMILY and Dearest friends,

WHAT A WEEK!!!!

Worked through the issue of frustration and the Hermana's and us are good now. In fact the apt is full of fun, laughs and fire blazing candy sticks and wrappers!!! Ha ha!! LOVE IT!

OK.... MY TICKET IS DONEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

1st Miracle!!! .... So my Thursday morning started at 3:30 AM got ready and left with an AMAZING couple the CLUFFS!!! They have 14 kids and 45 grand children!! I know INCREDIBLE Family!!! Love them. They were willing to take me to Tomball and drop me off at the Nix home by 6AM! Remember it's a 1 1/2 hour drive from here to there. got there and then we went to the Jail house...oh wait court house so I could visit with the District Attorney and he could then help me get this ticket off my record. So sis Nix came with me (thank goodness) and GUESS WHAT!? We find out the DA isn't EVEN THERE on Thursdays EVER and whoever tolled me that was wrong. I about sat on the floor and bawled!! ....luckily sis Nix was there to ever so sweetly inform her of my situation while I stood there looking pathetic. well the lady calls her supervisor over (betty) and we tell betty my situation that I have and I traveled and it's hard to get down here and I looked at her and said "mam, I just need to get this done with so that I can get back to the work that I do" she was so awesome, she said "hold on a minute" and came back and tolled us "there is a prosecuting attorney here and she might be able to see you, she's in the middle of a case, but I could check?" yes please!!! We said.

"She said she'd see you" WOW! Incredible. "This never happens," sis Nix said....which is so true, anyone that's ever gotten a traffic violation knows that people are almost never understanding and caring enough because they have to be so tough in this job. So anyways. We waited 20 minutes and then this beautiful (POWERFUL LOOKING) woman comes out....and called my name. She started to explain my options and we interrupted her and she very sternly said "hold on let me do my job." OOPS.....kept our mouths shut...when she was done I explained that I’d taken the safety course for this ticket, because the cop tolled me to, he took 1 1/2 months to turn the ticket in and here is my certificate for the drivers safety course. She said "oh, him....give me about 20 minutes and I'll see what I can do..." Oh boy my heart was pounding and my legs were like Jell-O....I remember dad last time I had to go to court in Oregon with a bunch of drug attics and criminals and you said ...."Do you want to EVER come back here?" and I shook my ghost white face and cried "noooooo"....well it wasn't that bad dad. But what you said kept running through my head!!~! Ha ha!!! Well she came back 15 minutes later while I tried not to make eye contact with anyone. Ha ha!! She called my name and said "YOUR FREE TO GO!!" sis Nix and I were both like ...."What?" what does that mean? Well she said "the cop took forever to turn the ticket in; you already took the course, if the case went to court it would have gotten dismissed, so I'm dismissing it now, your free to go!!!" SWEETTT!!! I about jumped and burst through the glass door before she could change her mind. I was so excited, sis nix was too cause she's been my 2nd hand man with getting rid of the ticket!! (THANK you SIS Nix I couldn't have done it with out you...literally I probably would have just stared at them blankly while my brain had a seazier.) I didn't have to pay anything more she was a miracle!!! I am going to send her a card and thank her, and if a book of Mormon is with it....then that's ok too! :_)

It was a blast to be back in Tomball, hard to go back to college station, but this week have been full of miracles to help me through it! PLUS----- 2 MORE BAPTISM DATES Halo and Yao from china! Story is later.

Jackie has had lots of opposition; her dad gave her a huge packet on anti-Mormon literature. But we talked with her and explained some things. She is good and still wants to get baptized. Her dad and mom after saying they weren't coming to her baptism said that they were going to cancel work and come! WOW!

Ha Kyu had a concern that he didn't think he could live the commandments after his baptism. He was reading 1 Nephi 31 and was worried. After we talked he said this: " Before we talked did not have confidence in keeping the commandments, but now after we talked, I have confidence"....WOW! He is doing great! Both Jackie and Ha Kyu came to church all 3 hours!

2 new baptism dates this week! Hao and Yao. Married for 1 year, Yao is the wife she wants to get baptized November 27th and he is a little tougher! But we took them to a baptism and they felt warm and she looked so happy and enthralled in what was going on! So I started to talk them about baptism and changed it by saying "when you get baptized..." then asked "do you want to get baptized?" how bout November 27th? He doesn’t think he'll be ready but she wants it. And she turned to him and said..." I want to get baptized...I want him to be with me....please!" she was so cute and it was incredible to see her testimony grow like that. Now we need to really work on them and teach the lessons. They only been taught the restoration, but have come to church 3 times. They leave after the 1st hour though the 2nd and 3rd time. So that's when he comes. We need to build their testimonies stronger together! They are from china! Here for school.

College station is good, tons of work, I LOVE IT!

Mom and dad!! I love you! Family and friends old and new I love you too! Sometimes life gets busy and frustrated like we are trapped and bound and get everything done that we need to accomplish and we feel like we haven't accomplished anything ever! Anyone ever feel like that? Ha ha! well I was thinking about that and how Nephi was bound in the ship and Laman and Lemuel wouldn't loose him until they saw that through the very power of God that they were about to be destroyed then they loosed him.
Sometimes we are Nephi strapped and bound and our ankles and wrists are sore and swollen, and yet we are bound by our own self’s. it's a battle within each of us....what is it that binds us down, why are we frustrated, sad, lonely, depressed, angry hurt what is our shackle, if you will? What binds us from being HAPPY!? Here we are in a storm the liahona isn't working all our loved ones are trying to help us, but we don't listen we wont let anything heal our heart or "loose us" why? I have learned pride goes 2 ways. thinking that your better than others, and then also beating yourself up until your so tightly tied up, that you forget who you are and the love Heavenly Father has for you as his daughter or son. I never realized that there is a difference in being humble and meek and being so low that we forget that the ATONEMENT is to make us at one with Christ so that like Nephi we can break the bans and pray for the winds to cease and the storm to cease and witness the miracle of the "Great Calm".

My heart burns when I think of Peter walking on water to get to Jesus but it's when he gets scared and looks down that he starts sinking. Jesus called to him”come" he knew Peter could do it, he encouraged him, if we keep our eyes fixed on Christ and take his yoke upon us, we will NOT SINK! if we put God 1st and get to the temple and pray with your family and study the words of God that we are so lucky to have we will strengthen our faith which then leads to the ACTION!....an incredible leader in my life said something to me one time...."did you know that bumble bees are too fat to fly? They are scientifically; their wings are too small for their huge bodies....but no ones tolled them....so they keep flying" ....what a gift...we are children of God! Literal Spirit children of God and he loves us, not because he has to, but because he just does. Our past sometimes feels heavy, but our future is magical and wonderful because we are daughters and sons of a king! It’s the times we forget that when we most need to remember it!

I love each of you so much and with all my heart! the gospel is true, Jesus Christ is our savior and brother and God is our father, he sent us here to have faith on his son Jesus Christ to repent of our sins and be baptized and receive the gift of the holy ghost and endure to the end. To know that one truth that I am a daughter of God. Not merely a creation of God, but a daughter is something I know is true. And we as members of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter day saints are the ONLY faith that knows this truth. let are hearts be broken and humble to hear the promptings of the holy spirit let our families know of our deep conviction to our savior and to spreading his gospel that we are children of God! Is my humble prayer!

I love you, I love you, I love you.....with all my heart, might mind and strength!

Love you from here to Heaven,
Sister Judkins

Letter #31

November 1, 2010

2701 Longmire Dr.
Pepper Tree Apt #204
College Station, TX
77845

Hello,

Its weird today I don't have much to say.

Jackie is getting baptized Nov 27th
Ha Kyu Lee is getting baptized Nov 20th

We have many people we are working with now and our days seam to race by and are full of teaching and learning and making mistakes and learning again! The Lord knows the time for each of his children.

I live with sis Cramer she is great, we get along well and laugh a lot. This week if I'm being honest has been extremely stressful and very hard crammed full of miracles and heart ache. This week I take care of my ticket and it should be finalized. I’m going to Tomball and going to talk to the DA and handle it once and for all, that will be VERY NICE to be done with....Biking is great and killing me! But I enjoy having the exercise because it makes me feel a lot happier and better. And we get to talk to so many people as we bike.

We met this atheist the other night and he was so nice, but it was crazy because he is so confused, he doesn't believe in any organized religion! Well, he needs to look in and pray and as Alma says "experiment" take just a little bit of faith or if you don't even have that, take the desire that you have to have faith and ask God, experiment upon the word and watch it grow, but to have something grow you have to nourish it, you can't just look at it and say grow! It doesn't work like that!

Sister Cramer's b-day was this week and she got TONS of mail! And we polkaed at a member’s house; well I played the piano while they jumped around everywhere...wow what a stress reliever that was! Then we climbed in the window because we forgot the key to get back into our apt and I was laughing so hard I almost ....well....that's enough.....lets just say it was a very funny day! Jackie came by and stood outside our window because it was passed curfew to give Sis Cramer her gifts. Ha! So funny we drank sparkling cider and laughed until we fell asleep! Sometimes a good laugh is all you need.

Ha Kyu is from Korea and he is amazing, he's getting baptized and them leaving back home 3 days latter, we teach all the Asian people here and wow! They are so incredible, it's hard and you have to really pray because they don't know about God and all that I've grown up with is different to them. So it's an incredible experience to teach them, well to be the instrument in which the Holy Spirit teaches them. But with Ha Kyu he is going to college and super busy but he's come to church all 3 hours for 2 weeks in a row!!! Talk about faith in every foot step. And our last lesson was great, I felt the testimony that he has and that he's growing. Now we just need him to read every day from the book of Mormon and pray. He is excited to teach his family back in Korea and he prays in Korean and wow! The spirit is strong; he said "I can't pray really good yet..." I said "Ha Kyu, I didn't even understand what you said, but you remember that feeling you told us you felt when you prayed about the book of Mormon? Warm peace fire? That’s what I felt just them as you were praying!” his eyes stared at mine for a second and I knew he was ready!

Missionary work in the best it’s sacrificing all so others that know all. Isn’t that what the savior did? Sacrificed all even his life so that we his brothers and sisters could have all....IF we wanted and followed God's commandments. If ye love me keep my commandments. Wow, the spirit of God....how inconceivable it is to me. How precious family relationships are and how sacred the temple work and blessings are to me. I am so grateful I get to be apart of this sacred calling of inviting others to come unto Christ by receiving the restored gospel through faith in Jesus Christ and his atonement, repentance, baptism by immersion for the remission of sins and the laying on of hands for the gift of the holy ghost by one who has the authority given to him through the one and only Jesus Christ. Act 2 - prophets and apostles. Why we need it.

We tracted into a couple from "the church of Christ" and he asked me to read this and I asked him to read the book of Mormon. This day was inspired all around. After going to him (when we were trying to go to another Investigator who wasn't there) we left and were happy. Now just 16 minutes earlier we had knocked at Handheld’s door ( an investigator that I've not met yet but the sisters before me have, so and so we taught her everything, but she would not answer her door.) as we were walking home, I veered off at her apt AGAIN. (Remember we just knocked about 15 minutes earlier with no answer) well I said we need to knock on Hadley’s door again. So we did.....and guess what...? ....The door opened right as we were about to walk away again! We were able to get in with her and the spirit bore testimony of Alma 32 as I opened my mouth the spirit spoke truth. I said "to know something is true you have to have the desire to want to know, to gain that desire you pray and read and always ask god if this is true. And he will tell you." It jumped from faith is not to have a perfect knowledge of things, but to hope for things which you cannot see which are true.... you must have a desire to know the things are true, to have hope you much desire and when you have hope you gain faith through prayer.

SO COOL!

Mom and dad I love you! Mom I do need more vitamins all my oils, I'm good on multi and Vitamins. C. I need all my oils. I can't think of anything else right now. I miss you all and I'm so sad to hear that Lisa Coffey is moving!!! :( My mouth dropped when I read that! And your other VT....oh so sad! But the Lord knows how we will be happy. Have faith right!? Give her a huge hug for me and tell her thank you for everything and love her.

Thank you for all you do for me, I miss you all and I love working hard, pray for missionary work pray for your friends and refer them to the missionaries!!!! Always! Don’t be afraid!!!

Love you all from here to heaven!
-Sister Judkins
P.S. my mail box has been pretty empty lately...maybe I’m learning humility.... :(

P.S.S. Thanks mom and best friend and Joe for writing me this week though, I can't tell you how much I needed your words of encouragement and love.

Letter #30

October 25, 2010

Family and Friends,
I am in College Station 1st ward the address is:

2701 Longmire Dr.
Pepper Tree Apt #204
College Station, TX
77845

Oh wow this week has been full of incredible miracles and miraculous blessings! I am now in College Station and I do love how much work there is to do here! More than I have ever seen on my mission! We have 15+ Investigators 4 progressing and 2 with a baptism date! This all happened this week! My heart is so full with the ultimate desire to serve with all my heart and give all of me to these people, to find how I can bring a little bit of home to them and share with them who they are: Children of God. What an incredible gift we have to know we are children of God, he is our fathers....some don’t know that....how heart breaking it is to not know. But how uplifting it is to share and let someone choose for themselves to serve and follow Jesus Christ and be baptized to follow their savior and receive the Holy Ghost by a worthy man that holds the actual Power to act in God's name!? ISNT" THAT INCREDIBLE! ....and yet why is it that those of us who've known it our whole lives and have been taught by goodly parent’s tent to forget or take it for granted? The spirit is to be our constant guide to lead us to truth to guide what we do. He will tell you all of that I have said and I will always be with you! Why wouldn't I want that with me every single day of my life? I know I am not strong enough or happy enough to try and go through out the trials of life with out this gift. And to share that with those around me and those I love like my family and friends is a precious gift I treasure.

Jackie is 21 and goes to school here. 6 of her guy friends just came home from missions and she has always been around the church, she came 2 weeks ago to ask for the missionaries to teach her, she wanted sisters and so then I got to meet her my 1st day in college Station. And WOW! I felt inspired to tell her to forget about the baptism date that was set for her Nov 27th and to pray about the book of Mormon and Joseph Smith Specifically. And she did and the next meeting (2 days latter) she tells us how her anxieties left when I tolled her to forget about the date for now and just pray. She said she wants to get baptized as soon as possible. We met with her 5 times last weeks and took her to a baptism and she went to church and saw him receive the gift of the Holy Ghost and wow! She was so happy. After the baptism she and I and Sister Cramer sat and talked and I cried with Jackie as she expressed her concern for how she has not tolled her parents that she was taking the lessons let alone wanted to get baptized. she wanted to push her baptism so she could tell her parents in person they live in Austin (2 hours away) after crying with her and holding her I asked: "Jackie, I don't think you should wait to tell your parents, because this weight on you is more than you have to bear, give it to the Lord, have faith in your parents and your father in heaven to help you!" she said "I want to tell them tonight. she was so scared and nervous because she wants her parents to love what she is doing and wants them to know the truth and not think she is crazy....she called her parents Saturday night and called us right after and I talked with her on the phone and asked how she felt, she said it was everything she though it would be, but she feels so much better! :) Her worries of loosing her friends and family were scary to her, but when she came to church on Sunday her prayers and ours were answered as she felt like she belonged with her new friends in the ward. She is incredible and will be baptized in Austin with her family there and her lds ward she grew up with going sometimes. we can't go because it's out of our mission, but wow, she just needs this gift, her life is about to be filled with the Holy ghost. I love her with all my heart.

We are designated the Asian teaching sisters.....ha ha....ya right!!! Can’t speak anything! But there are so many Asians we are teaching. 1. Yao and Hao (Yao came to church on Sunday all 3 hours as well as Ha Kyu and Rosario and her family and Shirley (who we are teaching tonight, she is so cool, she said straight up "I'm not getting baptized though"...that's ok it's not us that converts it's the Spirit of God like a fire that burns. 2. Ha Kyu Lee he's getting baptized Nov 20th and going back to china the 23rd. 3. Yidi (we just got last night she is an exchanged student and the member came up to me after and whispered in my ear "you were the 1st missionary brave enough to ask her to take the lessons") AMAZING!!!! Can you feel how much excitement is in me!!??? A LOT! ....so much potential so much work!

I love the work, I am trying so hard to memorize the 500 members we have in the ever changing family college ward and I think I'm doing pretty well so far. We BIKE EVERYWHERE, but the members also help and drive us which is great because we get LOTS of members to come with us to lessons! This is a blessing for sure! How grateful I am for this ward and the referrals that they give and the trust and push they have on the missionaries to teach their friends. WOW! I loved church we talked about how patience is essential to becoming like our Heavenly father and how yes it's so hard, but it's all worth it.

I love the gospel I love my family!! John congratulations, but I'm really sad that you didn't write me yet. Please take some time out and write me and if Jen could write me too, maybe I will tell you what your sister thinks about her. I know you love me and will write me and have Jen write me too. John I appreciate you, know that you are loved beyond measure by me and mom and dad and the family. But especially me! So please don't leave me hanging me want to know how it all happened.

Mom and dad thank you for your letters I can't tell you how much I needed them and how my heart was filled with love. I love and appreciate you with all my heart!

Katie....what can I say....ever faithful ever true, Best friend. Thank you I love you!

I love you all from here to Heaven,

Sister Judkins

Letter #29

October 18, 2010

Friend’s family,

I got transferred to Collage Station!!! Packing my place is crazy!!! ..... I just sit on the floor with a bunch of stuff and cry....and then I get up and try again. The new address is:
Oh I'll give it to you in a bit!
Wow an eventful week this has been for both me and my family. Trust in the Lord with all thy heart and lean not unto thine own interpretations. Mom I love you so much, I wish I could be home for a day and just let you and dad and the kids know just how much I love you and miss you and how hard it is to trust in the Lord sometimes. But I have to understand that he knows just how I feel, and I can pray for answers and he will listen and then lead me....I don't HAVE to listen, but I do want to, because he is the one that knows how to give true happiness! And I trust in my savior because I know he lives.

This week was full of changes and following the leadership and council of our priesthood leaders and understanding that Heavenly Father knows and trusts his children to follow him when he leads them gently by the hand. My heart has truly been broken with the news on Saturday that informed me that I will be transferred and be leaving my area here in Tomball and I will be going to Collage Station. It's when you know what you want and you know what the Lord wants and when you feel your heart hurt because you are giving up what you want (even when both are good) for what the Lord wants.

It makes me think. When we want something do we listen and are we prepared to listen to the promptings of the still small voice even when it's something we DON'T want to do? But remember this: what is the plan that Heavenly Father Has for us? "The Plan of Happiness"....yes that's it....so why don’t' I trust him to know what is going to make me happy in the end? the Lord knows that the Gospel of Jesus Christ will make all of his children happy in the end....and yet we disregard it as not because we are happy now, with what we have and were we are...I want to stay in this pig poop because it's warm and feels good, it kind of smells bad but other than that I'm happy, what do you have that can make my pig poop better? ..... we don’t' know at first that after sitting in the pig poop for a long time it will eventually put toxins in our body and kill us by degrees, no we are fine where we are at. But if we would have just had a little faith to pray and clean up and walk out and up on the hill we would be able to see the beautiful hot springs that sparkled the area. Why is it that sometimes we just don't want to.....

.....just don't want to follow the prophet.....
.....just don't want to listen to my parents who strive to be good examples.....
.....just don't want to grow up and live up to who I am....
.....don't want the gift that my brother paid with such a terrible price!


I want you to know that "Just don't want to"....is going to happen all the time....I really don't think anyone just can't wait to get home to fold the 50 loads of laundry piled on their bed ...no....but we do it, because when were done we're happier. I know that this is a true principle and I love how Nephi says: I will go and do the things which the lord has commanded, for I know...." he didn't say "Oh boy, I can't wait to go get the plates and have people come try and kill me and my brothers hit me over the head with a big stick!!! Ya baby, I can't wait"....no, that's not what he said. He followed because he loved his father in heaven and trusted him. How are we on this? I have a looooong ways to go, but I am "going and doing" and that's what matters.

This week Sister Petersen and I have worked hard to find and teach and follow up with appointments. We have a new baptized member Juan that came to church this Sunday and we went and taught him and eddy his friend, he is awesome. I think he really is interested, he's not happy with his religion (Baptist) and any really, he's had a really hard life. But we talked and I ended teaching the restoration and a little about the temple and the fruits of the church!! WOW!!! So awesome, he said he's read the Bible and I asked if he'd read a Book of Mormon if I gave him one, he said yes. We gave him one and Juan tolled us Sunday that they continued to talk for 2 hours after we left!!! WOWOWOWOWO!!!! So amazing that is for sure!

Elder Costa said to follow the spirit and when he says "Testify and leave the family" follow....don't finish your chocolate cake, just follow the prompting and come back latter. Let the spirit have time to work within the people's hearts. Sometimes we all need time to let the spirit work on us, as missionaries you see it all the time you find yourself as a child of God. You have to, because you don't belong anywhere for 1 1/2 years to 2 years. literally you have to feel how others feel when you don't belong.....because those who don't know that they are a child of God and he has a plan for them and they lived with him before we came here and that's why we want to return to him, feel that longing and desire to just belong.....we have that truth....you do and I do....open our mouths and let them know. What an incredible experience.

The missing mom was found and now they want to be taught too!!! SO COOL! and a member we've been trying to get a hold of to meat with her friend to teach found us on Sunday and so that we can go teach her friend too...well not me but sister :Petersen! She will do great and her new companion Sister Taylor will be wonderful and will truly be good together.

My new companion is sister Craimer and she seams......umm......sweet.....quite a ruff sense of humor, I think she'll be great....pray! But the Lord knows me and knows his children and so things will work amazing, because he is the master teacher, not me! but I will be in an all BIKE area (YES.....I"M going to totally die!!! but hopefully I'll lose these 20 pounds I've gained!) and I'm in the only apt with 4 sisters!!! HA HA!!! WOOT WOOT that is going to be so fun and crazy I think!!! And I hope they don't get sick of me too soon! NAH! it will be wonderful because I'm supposed to be there!!! umm....Christmas is coming up and it will be my 1st one without my family!!!! Its interesting mom and dad, I didn't think I'd have to leave family while I came out on my mission, but leaving Tomball there are some incredible people that my heart breaks for because I feel like I'm leaving family!!! But ya know absence makes the heart grow fonder....ha ha! It will be ok!!! I have high hopes and a broken heart.....but I can feel the spirit!

I love you and pray for you each day!

Love you from here to Heaven
-Sister Judkins

Letter #28

October 11, 2010

Family and Friends,

This week was AMAZING!!! I love how crazy things follow me and how Heavenly Father knows his children so incredibly well!!

Ok start of with GUES WHO CAME TO TALK WITH US one of the 7 presidents of the 70's : Elder Costas (He spoke in General Conference) came to our mission and we had a 3 mission conference and he spoke of how we can open our mouth ALLWAYS and teach people and NOT lessons!!!! IT WAS BOMB!!!! He says: "It's easy, no problem....peace of cake to share the gospel in America...." I'm like....ha ha, man this guy is good what does he say....then he continued and said " I just start talking to someone about the gospel and introduce myself as a member of the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day saints and ask do you know about us?....YES they say....."Oh, are you a member?"...no....they say.....'Why not?" ha ha ha!!!! The 400 missionaries there busted up laughing, but my mouth was dropped the whole time....AMAZING this man just asks, why aren't you a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints? INCREDIBLE....I can do that!!!! Oh wow it was so incredible I loved every second of his talk to us. My heart leaped for joy "I can say that?" I thought to myself...I thought I was pretty bold before, but oh no, I was like a little pansy...so now I can really speak boldly and ya know what we tried it!!! when we started tracking I started to ask "oh are you a member..." and instantly they are a little shocked but we have a common ground if not for a few seconds....ha ha wow! They don’t feel as intimidated and they sense that I am not there to force anything on them. Oh I hope that made some sense to you but if not, just know that Sister Judkins has it making sense in her brain!! Ha!

WOW~ I have been blessed beyond measure: an incredible experience this week: Thursday we usually go to a group of ladies and knit and visit with them (they are from all kinds of different religions I love these feisty ladies!!!) and my companion was really excited to go because we'd missed it a few weeks in a row, but all of a sudden I felt a sick feeling and after comp study I told her we are supposed to go tracking, we prayed about a street. MARY JANE LN.....and then got lost getting there and almost just forgot it, when we found it, we parked and said a prayer, the 2nd house we came to a lady was talking on her phone outside and looked at us like we were crazies!! She said "who are you and what do you want"....I’m thinking oh boy, she thinks were J-dubs....I said "we're missionaries" "Oh, she says and hangs up the phone an talks to us....we spent almost 1 1/2 hours there with this women and her sister and they continued to explain why when I asked "how are you' she said "not good" .....She told us her mother who suffered from By-Polar syndrome (a very serious type) went missing on Monday at 11:30PM and it was Thursday! She kept saying wow, maybe you’re supposed to be here, maybe your going to find her and continued to tell us how 2 of her best friends are Mormon and she went to Young Women’s when she was younger and we gave her a BOM and said a prayer with her, after the prayer she started to cry I gave her a hug and told her "it will be ok". They lived in a trailer and her sister has 3 kids from 3 different guys not married and she's 5 months pregnant. Oh my goodness the love the savior has for these two girls is incredible I could feel it. They were worried and trying to be tough and here we are (truly not able to do much of anything) but if nothing else we were there to be the saviors hands to comfort his daughters that were in need. And wow! What a miracle we left our hearts full of Charity and our legs eaten over twice by mosquitoes, but I didn’t' even care, we had followed the spirit and wow!

Elder Costa spoke of following the spirit and not memorizing the lessons, but teaching to the needs of the people.

Last night we had a hard experience: after receiving a referral and setting an appointment for a man named Steve we had a lesson with him and his "complete Jewish" wife. His mom referred him and the wife said the mom is not a true believer, but rather just uses the church because she is in a bad situation. When the wife talked her eyes would look like shark's eyes and her tone sounded deep and load and she started almost yelling at some points. They met us with smiles and set us at the table with homemade cookies... (Oh we had felt like we should fast and I had started to get a very sick feeling in my stomach about 2 hours before we went to the meeting.) What started as a "golden lesson" or so it seemed, turned into them telling us after we shared Joseph Smith's experience that he felt sorry for us....that we were being tricked by a false prophet and that when my companion was crying it reminded them of their son who was led by a false prophet and who almost tore their family up inside and killed his wife 3 times in one week. (How much of that is exaggerated I can only imagine) they continued to put my companion's testimony and the word "Pagan" together.... WOW! We had a member come with us and she was shocked she was actually baptized and sealed just last year in the temple. Her eyes were as big as marbles. My feeling of a pit in my stomach had been confirmed. when we left my companion said the words I just recently said to her with tears in my eyes "WHY?" Why did we have to go there and teach and just let them rip us to shreds and take something so special and trample it under their feet?" And I repeated her same words she said to me, "Because when they stand before the bar of judgment they WILL KNOW...."
The last words I finished with were these to the Rossi's, I asked the wife "have you every really wanted to know and prayed about weather or not Joseph Smith was a prophet?'" Because if you don’t' WANT to know YOU WILL NEVER KNOW!!!" and I looked into her soul when I said that and saw anger. No she has never wanted to know, she says "I know it couldn't be, it's wrong I know he's not a prophet......the saddest part of this is that she will NEVER KNOW....because she will never ask. Just like Laman and Lemuel when they said to Nephi, the Lord will not make these things known unto us....and Nephi says, ye have not asked....If we do not ask the lord will not give. Because that in a way takes away our free agency and that is Satan’s plan.
Our hearts broken and our hope dashed for them and their progression in the gospel fallen, we left and through many tears of sorrow reminded ourselves of who we are and how the Savior of mankind was Humiliated and bruised.....but then Sunday came....when we struggle and are embarrassed for doing what the Lord would have us do, we cannot be discouraged, but rejoice because you shared what the Lord wants us to, and he will take care of the rest.
Needless to say we were comforted by our beloved savior and our hearts are healed. We did leave a book of Mormon and sent him to LDS.org to read Joseph Smith's History.

This week has been incredible and when things start to look good sometimes they fall, but I've always taught what you do when you fall in a race....YOU GET BACK UP AND RUN AFTER THE PERSON THAT TRIPPED YOU....and BEAT HIM! That person is Satan. And we all have power to beat him. We are children of GOD....whether we believe it or not.... we are...and we are ordained with the TRUTH and the Truth will make us free and all those who repent and keep his commandments.

I love you all so much. This week I was struggling. And I can't tell you how incredible it was to see a package and letter from my HOME WARD in Lake Oswego wow! I was letting myself feel a pity me phase of oh no body misses me everybody hates me......ha ha.....and then I get a HUGE PACKAGE and 30-+ love notes from my Primary home family!! and even though I felt like I didn't do a good job when teaching in primary (my little un-experienced self) I felt an energy that came with all the squiggles and letters and hearts and names that spoke deeper then just me saying" Sister Judkins you are a daughter of God, and we are children of god and we support you no matter what!" WOW! Thank you Lake Oswego Primary thank you! I truly love each and every one of you and look forward to the day when I get to see you grow and learn and teach others and serve your own missions! YES YOU CAN! And thank you for letting me know that I CAN TOO! I love you!
and the letter from the Bishopric...thank you, the support that I received this last week lifted my down spirits to heights that tell me my savior knows me and loves me and used his children to reach out his hands to those in need. And my needs were met this week! THANK YOU LAKE OSWEGO WARD! I truly love you so much!
Thank you also to my dear family that never cease to stop caring for me and mom for all the $ you send in giving me packages and bread and everything I need, I feel so incredibly spoiled. And thank you Katie, and dad and the family. Thank you for your prayers I can feel them. thank you to my friends in the WESTLAKE SINGLES ward, I loved the letters I received and I swear there must have been a talk that stated "support your missionaries" or something and they all came the exact days that I needed them!!! Thank you so much for supporting and loving me through all my imperfections! I love each of you and miss you!

Ok I love you! Pray for times to share the gospel teach people not lessons!!!! It’s a peace of CAKE!!!

LOL
Love you all from here to Heaven,
-Sister Judkins

Letter #27

October 4, 2010


Howdy ya'll,

All right! This week has been a week of ups and downs but ending with a HUGE bunch of MIRACLES. Did you all love General Conference! I hope you did! I loved President Monson's talk on Attitude of gratitude, why is that so hard for so many of us! :)

I want to tell each of you THANK YOU!

Thank you mom and dad for all the sacrifice you have gone through to raise us kids and even our friends at times and to teach us TRUE and FAITHFUL principals of the gospel of Jesus Christ. Thank you for loving through the tears and spending long sleepless nights solving problems and making us sit on your couch while all our eyes are blood shot because you wouldn't let any of us go to bed angry and with out a hug and kiss and a "I love you". Thank you for your strength and courage to move away from family and to our beloved Oregon and growing out of nothing with God a business that has been inspired. Thank you for waking up early every morning because you knew how important family scripture study is. Thank you for the tears over the phone and the shoulders to cry on and the time set apart to talk and council your children and friends and family. Thank you for serving as ward missionaries and full time. Thank you for staying worthy to go to each of our temple weddings and setting a constant example for me to someday live up to, but to always look up to. Thank you for teaching me what an eternal Marriage looks like and how it is possible ONLY with God. Thank you for your love even when I didn't deserve it. The hugs that would lift me up when I brought myself so low and felt like such a failure, thank you for teaching us that we can DO and BE anything. For NEVER doubting my dreams and ambitions, for smiling and whispering "I love you" as you watched my never ending choir and play and musical performances. Thank you for the hours and thousands of gray hairs ;) you ripped out while I was learning to play the piano, and always encouraging me to heights I couldn't have made my own. Thank you for being my parents, oh how grateful I am for you mom and dad! My cup runneth over with blessings I have in my life and how grateful I am to be so pleased and truly happy to know my parents are one of the great and noble ones and they put their trust in God. What an incredible example you are to me! Thank you, thank you......thank you!

To my sisters: I would not change you for anything! My sisters my friends that have been such powerful examples in my life. How grateful I am for you, your support and love and examples and encouragement. My sisters you have always been there for me when I need you. I love you Tasha, Jill, Jules babe, and Meagan and Erica I love you. I love you for loving my brothers and for coming into our family and staying strong. My sisters I know I am not easy to love....I know that....and yet you do! I'm so eternally grateful for that! I love you with all my heart and I pray and am grateful for you each individually so much!

To my Bros: What can I say. We have gone through a lot together haven't we? Deep talks, silly talks, stupid dances with the black light down stairs ha ha! I love my brothers: Josh, Jac, John, Joe, and Jed....David: thank you for taking care and loving my sister. My brothers how I look up to you. How I long for your happiness. I have worked with you, worked side by side with you and how I leaned on you and cried to you. thank you for having open arms for beating up all those that have the guile to look at me the wrong way :) how I admire each of you my elder and younger. How lucky am I...thank you for staying worthy to hold the priesthood and thank you for staying worthy to come to the temple when I get married. My husband has a lot to go through to get to me doesn’t he....poor guy.... I love you, Thank you.

This letter is a little different I felt it needed to be. I want you to know of my love and concern and my admiration for each of my dear brothers and sisters and mom and dad and MY FAMILY! Isn’t that what life is all about. I hope we never lose that sight that life is centered all around families. "Families can be together forever" why is it our eyes get wet each time we sing that song, dad you’re always the one to start it too! WHY!? Because WE ARE FAMILY! .... WE ARE THE JUDKINS! And more importantly than that, we are eternally bound and sealed together forever! ONLY IF WE KEEP ALL THE COMMANDMENTS AND KEEP ALL OUR COVANANTS than can we return together and are with our heavenly father and family!

I love you, the work is going good, I know my savior lives and he loves me and you, and the Book of Mormon is true. This Gospel is truth! And the way we show our love to God is through our willingness to share it, why? Because it is who we are!

I love you again, I love Tomball and I've truly grown. I long to serve, love, teach, invite and encircle our Heavenly father's children in the arms of his love, and I have arms that can do that. The only thing that stops us is us!

Quote of the week: ...."from failure we learn a lot....from success...eh, not so much" -Meat the Robinson.s

I love you from here to Heaven,

Sister Judkins

Letter #26

September 27, 2010

Dad thanks for that song, I loved it so much! Mom I loved your DADADADADAAAAA!!!! In the back round!! HILARIOUS!!! I started bawling and everyone looked at me funny! I love getting videos from you that is so amazing!!! Maybe I will try and make my song and send it to you! Today I have to go to the member’s home for a really long time and take my test for my ticket!!! HUGH!!!! Shoot me in my foot, wait. No don’t' do that I can't tract! ha ha!! Just kidding, it's ok though this family is like being at home. :) They are incredible. Not where else I’d rather do a 6 HOUR Safety course!!! Hugh 6 hours......ugh......ugh.....

Ok. Family this week has been wild and crazy and wild and crazy again!!!! Ok where to start where to start!!!

1. Brenda tried to commit suicide and kept going to members that live by here and asking her to call us and tell us she tried to commit suicide, we went and visited and she was all smiles from ear to ear, and well not any more interested in the gospel then after she tolled us she didn't want to quit smoking or get baptized, well it's hard, but everyone gets their choice and we just get to invite. If we forced that would be Satan’s plan. No matter how much we love someone and want them to chose the right, we can't make their choices or force them to do it right. I wonder how hard it must be for the Lord to watch and now only "a few will find" eternal life with him and their families. so sad to me when I think of how many people just don't want to listen or change "I’m too old" or "I like where I am now" dad your song is so TRUE!!!

2. Another call was of a woman that strangled her daughter (fewer actives) and that was scary. No one died, but this all happened in 1 day!!! Crazy day. Oh and

3. Our other investigator Randy overdosed again and was sent away to work for a while.

It has been VERY crazy and hard dealing with all the issues that are going around. But the Lord is here and he will take care of us.

We found another cock roach and man, those things just NEEVER DIE!! We found one dried up and turned over by the TOILET!!! HAHAHA!! GROSS....I picked it up with card board and we started taking pictures, then all of a sudden it started t twitch!!! UGH NaaaaAAAASTY!!! So gross! I quickly put a jar over it and started running around like a chicken and through it out side!!! We left it one a friend’s front door in a box, ha ha! Merry Christmas!!! That was funny.

We had an incredible Sisters Conference a few days ago, which we arrived late to, not my fault we got lost. But I learned where north when the sun comes up is!!! Ha ha! it was so much needed, and interesting to hear the talks and how great it was to hear about not judging others (which was also mentioned by President Monson in RS broadcast, which was incredible) and how judging goes 2 ways. oh I'm better then so and so and I know more or my hair has a better "Utah bump" than that girl, or oh look at her Utah bump hair due etc....every day we judge so quickly, and yet we know that's wrong but have you ever thought about putting yourself below someone else is judging also? I'm not as pretty, or I'm so much fatter, or uglier, or not as smart, or wow those missionaries are so much better at teaching than me...etc. it's so easy to tare yourself down and not realize that that is a master way Satan works at us, through his greatest tool: distraction....it was a blessing to realize this because as missionaries we need to build others up but shouldn't’t that also mean to build us up too, through service and charity which is the pure love of Christ!?

This past week my goal was the work on Charity and it's incredible how many talks and situations I've been in to express my charity and to show and also to feel that by having charity I am much happier and not afraid to help and serve or smile and hug. The Pure love of Christ is something so important that with out it....we are nothing....wow! I want to be something! I was to have charity.

I have realized that sometimes you can "love to much" a member I love dearly tolled me once, an interesting term to use. There is a difference between love and charity. Love is sometimes blind. charity sees through the fluff and pain and gets to the issue at hand, charity is moving on as a missionary even though you may love the investigator, but understand that if we have charity "the pure love of Christ" then we must let them have their choice, but we did our job by inviting and loving and trying our very best to support and share the truth of the book of Mormon and the gospel that has been restored. And sometimes even after months and years of teaching, they might just say "no, I don't want it"

It reminds me of that doughnut story. of the seminary teacher that had a boy do 15 push ups so each student could have a do nut, but when the boy started to get tiered after 200 and a pool of sweat was laying on the floor way he flopped after each set was completed, some of the students said "no, I don’t' want it" and the teacher asked the boy red and soaked in a puddle of sweat to do 15 push ups so that Suzie could have a donut that she doesn’t want! the class's eyes were full of tears and the teacher even at this point was tearing up to see the pain of john, the boy doing the push ups. he slowly push himself up and what started to be 1 second between push ups turned into 5 grueling minutes between each one, as his entire body couldn't control the shaking 13...14.....15......his arms buckled and he dropped to the ground. The girl yells, "I said I didn't want it" the teacher said, but he sill has to pay for the donut for you because this is a gift for all whether you will accept it or not. the entire class had tears streaming down their faces including john and the teacher....the teacher didn't realize at this point that 5 extra people had come in and sat down, one more was about to come in when the entire class yelled:"NO, DON"T COME IT" but a notice muffled out of john's voice "no, let them in" the teach then with a stunned face and red eyes turned to the boys and asked “do you want a donut boys?" "OH YEAH!" the boys said. He then turned to john and he proceeded with out being asked to do 15 more push ups for each one. -this is CHARITY.

Christ suffered the same for each of us, and yet sometimes we look at the gift and say, no I'm not good enough to get it, or no I don't want it. and we as missionaries and friends of those looking cry and watch our sister, brother, mom, dad, friend, family member or loved investigators or less actives say "no, I don't want it" oh how painful that is to hear and see. Many a times I have left a home hunched and tears welling up in my eyes as I ask. "why?" my companion said something to me which was this: "Because they will know when they meet God at the judgment seat that they were tolled the truth and that God sent 2 young sister missionaries to teach you and you turned them away, and we will would have done our job, we invited, they now have to chance to except or say "NO, I DON'T WANT IT". You see a woman yelled at us when she saw us offer her husband a book of Mormon.... "NO....N....O I will not have that book in my house". "Oh ye fare ones" how painful it is to see, but the joy comes with those who are ready and maybe it takes years, but we are doing our job!

I know the Gospel of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day saints is the fullness of the gospel, we have a prophet we knew we lived before we came here and that we will be resurrected and when Christ comes again every knee will bend and every tongue will confess. and the book of Mormon is a testimony that "2 nations is a testimony that I am God" we have a true prophet called of God on the earth today, thousands of missionaries every year serve missions to share the gospel and to show their Father in Heaven just how much we love him and are willing to sacrifice years of our lives just for him. During testimony meeting brother Celanese got up and said "ya know I would die for my savior, but why do I struggle so hard to LIVE for him?" brothers and sisters my heart burns....I KNOW! But knowing once is not enough. Read and pray every day. Strengthen our faith in Jesus Christ and his atonement, his gift for us to repent. If we know, we would DO! Joseph Smith is a true prophet of God, and the book of Mormon is a 2nd testament and there will be more to come, the last days are now, we must step up and hold our lights high, not judge and hide it low, because we don’t' think we are good enough or brave enough. If we think those thoughts as my mom always taught me "Satan wins" and we are sad, but so are those who are looking for the light, and can't find it. I love the lord, in him I will boast not of myself for with out him I am nothing, but with him I am everything and can become like him if I strive (struggle) to EVERY DAY! If I don't strive for it every day, I will loose my light. Read and pray and stay focused on the goal of the celestial kingdom with God. We must know who we are before we can teach or help others come to understand who they are.

I love you with all my heart, sometimes it hurts. Oh how I long for my loved family and friends to be happy and find True happiness, eternal happiness.

I love you forever and always, from here to heaven (home)

-Sister Judkins

Letter #25

September 20, 2010

Family and friends,

This week has been a week of self discovery! Sister Petersen and I have been learning who we are and how we can feel confidence in which we are and not worry about what others think of us.

The talk with Brother THevanen was really eye opening. I needed it badly. And even though there were many tears, my heart felt like it could keep going and that the Lord knew me and Brother Thevenen gave me a perfect assignment: How can I feel better about myself inwardly instead of relying outward on what others say about me. I have been feeling like I lost my fire that I knew so well in me. I felt lost. Now I am finding the fire again, it comes through having faith, building others up, but as equally important to build myself up and not tare myself down, because the only person that's laughing is Satan. I am the captain of my own soul, and I choose who I am and what I am supposed to be! Slowly I am learning this, and little by little beginning to believe it.

Clark canceled on us this week.

No one came to church....except for a less active we've been working with for a long time; in fact we are having great progression with him, and his non-member wife, SHE ACTUALLY CAME TOO! She is Asian and said it was different, I told her that's ok, and it probably was because you have never come before. They left after sacrament meeting, but they came. And we are teaching them on Friday. We asked her to pray to know she is a daughter of God. That is really foreign to her and she raised her eye brow when we told her that, but she said she would, the spirit was so strong, even though her kids were screaming. She is a great mom that works really hard, her husband who is the less active seems like he struggles to balance fatherhood with work. It’s almost like he doesn’t know what to do when his kids cry. I realized that just like a companionship, a marriage if not cultivated and constantly worked at, will wilt and eventually shrivel up and die.

Brenda we have backed off a little, but last night we cut out hearts and wrote a sweet note to express our love, but most importantly her Savior's love and support! We will visit her this week, but shorter visits and no pushing, she will make the choice if she desires to. And the Lord will give us our desires.

Randy has 6 weeks to change his life and then he goes back to court to see if he gets locked up for 15 years. His mother is so grateful for our visits and constantly is trying to help us, she even said she would leave a key for her house for us to come in and do whatever if she's not home. ha ha! So sweet to offer such trust she has. She is less active and Randy is a non member (her son).

We are working on investigator Volley ball with the youth, starting small with the young women, to have then bring their friends that they want to share the gospel with and we would get together and play volley ball together and they would get to know us the missionaries so they will not be scared to ask questions. So cool.

We are looking for new finding ideas. It’s been a busy lazy week, lowest numbers this week on my mission, still met 20 lessons, but we average 28, this week we are going to work hard and find those that are ready!

All is well in Tomball the ward is incredible and sister Petersen and I are happy and ready for a new week.

----that was a letter I sent to my Mission President, I just thought I should share it, it's a little more personal then normal, but for some reason I was supposed to share it.

Well Sister Petersen and I have been enjoying our time together, thank you mom for your words of encouragement! I really and truly love hearing your voice through your words, and don't worry you don't ever have to filter what you want to say to me, I’m so grateful I have a mother that I share everything with and am not scared of her judgment, you have always lifted me up to heights I thought I would fall at. My parents I love so much. Dad you have been on my mind a lot, I need a letter from you when you get a chance ok!? I know you’re busy, but when you get a chance...I'll be patient! :)

I am so very grateful for this transfer, its interesting how up and down it has been, my MTC comp and I are having such fun together and we are eating TONS of smoothies!!! I'm talking we live off them! We have almost 4 the other day! I down sized from a court jar to 1/2 a court! YUM!!! So good. I drink my milk and put my brewers yeast which by the way mom!!! I am running low on! (I have enough for probably another 2 weeks if you're not ready for a package yet! :) I am writing in my journal really funny silly stories that I can’t' wait to read to every one, it's HELARIOUS!

Ok funny, sister Petersen and I were talking late at night after an awesome day of service: We tiled a call siding...mom I can totally do your tile in the kitchen when I get home. We're getting the back splash and John and Joe and I will whip it out in 1 day! Totally know how to do it now! Thanks to all those construction jobs I did with dad! Ha ha!

Ok but we were talking and I start screaming and lift my feet off the carpet onto my chair, ahhaahahah!!!! Sister Petersen jumps away from here and I am pointing right at her feet there was this HUGE!!!!! Cock roach!!! 3 inches, huge antennas and long hairy legs...YUCK...I start yelling and I grab the camera Sis P is freaking out and yells get the 409....I run and get it while she is trying to catch it, then after a 15 minute battle of spraying the 409 (hello totally doesn’t kill cock roaches) so we were fighting the curtains and all of a sudden the bug ran crazy fast and we screamed bloody murder it's 10:25pm by now....then I take a shoe and just start thumping it. I hear a CRUNCH....and lift the shoe and I see 2 now running.....ahahah!!!....it was like we were in Hercules movie and the heads of the monster keeps doubling!!! NO.....it was the BUTT!!! The head was dead but the butt kept moving, his legs all hairy and nasty...sister p said it's a reflex, I said "Uh uh, that is no reflex I've ever seen...that's NASTY" Oh man, I had to clean all the 409 up and vacuum the entire apt before we could get to sleep. YUCK!! I video taped it, ha ha! NASTY TEXAS BUGS!!!

Hmm....life is good, missionary work has been tough this week, but it's a new week and today we get to be rejuvenated!!! I thank you all so much for your letters, thank you again sister Cottle for your letter and the RS newsletter!! WOW!!! I'm in there so cool to know my ward back home remembers me!!! I love you all so much and appreciate all you do. Thank you thank you thank you for your letter my dear friends and family, especially mom I look for yours every Week!!! You lift me up, and I love them. And Katie ever faithful, thank you!

I am slowly writing back, but this week I am sending off a few, please write me, I promise I will write back! John, Joe, goes for you too, and Jac and Josh and Jed I kind of miss my brothers and I want you to know how much I love you and would love just to know how you are doing?

Mom!!! You PUT ME IN THE PICTURE!!!! Our family is all actually together!!! WOW!!!! I love that picture!!! , mom could you send me a 5X7 of the one were everyone of our immediate family is in it (and my picture): D my family never forgets me!!! Thanks mom, that idea made my heart jump. And then one of everyone....I guess Sam has made the family photo all ready Hugh!? ha ha! Cool!

I need good healthy treats yummy stuff to eat, mom any ideas!! I think I am allergic to pastas. ugh!!! GREAT KATIE, now I really hate NOODLES!!! ha ha!

Well I love you, I love the Lord, I love missionary work and oh dad! Can you e-mail me that song you made up on your mission so that I can sing it and make me happy!!! PLEASE!!! "so beat me and slam the door, tell us you've been saved before, treat us like a real good Christian should......please lady let us in..." ha ha!!! I am making up a song just like you did dad! To "love song" IT: S SO GOOD!!! But will you please send that to me please! :) I have such a clever family!!!! Ha ha !!!

I love you from here to Home!!!

Love sister Judkins