Letter #46

Hey ya’ll

Ok this week is AWESOME!!!

Funny: we found a family!! Totally CRAZY COOL!!! Our lesson went great, we are going to invite him to a baptism soon and invite his kids to YW and YM etc. a family of 5! Pray for SUCUSS just like Amman prayed for, and we WILL see it!

Oh, I was asked to sing in sacrament meeting next Sunday the 12th and I'm excited. I am singing with an incredible lady she owns her own family business too and it’s fun to talk business with her. (Just a little) :) she and I are singing the "Olive Tree" something, the song John's group sang on their CD the 3 girls. Yup!!! Roberta and I are singing it.. She is an incredible singer, and we blend beautifully! It’s going to be wonderful! I'm hoping all our investigators and fewer actives will come and support!!! And feel the spirit! :) YEAHHAH hoo for singing!!! I sing all the time, when I am biking, 2 days ago I sang all day long, my companion was probably like "egh"..."STOP"...I keep singing dad's song "SO CURSE US AND SLAM THE DOOR....TELL US YOU'VE BEEN SAVED BEFORE....."ha hahaha!!!! Hilarious!!! love missionary work!

We've been working with a lot of less active members who are struggling and trying to find themselves,. they are so incredible. I love learning how I can reach out to them and love them with everything that I have. How grateful I am to know what love really is like. so many have such trouble feeling it. Heavenly Father's love that is, and taking it in as truth. Love from our Heavenly Father is what we are all looking for, we want to feel wanted and feel that fire as so many call it. How incredible to see that spark trickle and spark in people's lives. It's hard though sometimes, because you know they are beginning to feel it, but they are:

1. To tired or worn out to do anything about it.
2. Don't believe they are worthy of His love.
3. Or prideful, "I have done it alone once; I can do it again...can't I?"

This reminds me of the poem "footprints" I remember Jill (my sister) when she was teaching YW (I loved when she taught) one Sunday and she printed out this picture of Christ signing "I love you" with the nail print in his hands. I think of how much Jesus Christ has suffered for us his sisters and brothers and he did it because he:

1. Loved the father and wanted to obey.
2. Because he loves each of us individually and wants to know how we feel so he can truly succor us with love.

Why do we fight so hard against God's love?
I can bear my testimony that Heavenly Father loves each of us. we are his kids.

Take a second and think of a child in your life under the age of 8, what do they look like, what are they doing? Playing in the dirt, smearing your make-up on the mirror, playing in the toilet with your watch or cell phone, just woke up from a nap and their cheeks are all Rosy? Think of how they trust you,. how they let you pick them up high off the ground, trusting that you won’t let them fall. How hard is it for us to trust our Heavenly Father, to let him lift us up and trust that he knows the end from the beginning? Trust that he truly does love us, wants us to be happy and that even though sometimes we jump out of his arms and fall and blame him, he still loves us and his arms are open. always.

I have just begun to learn the love Heavenly Father must feel for his children, me, and you, my new ward families in Texas. It's a warm, tangible, sometimes painful heart wrenching feeling that is a constant quest to follow the spirit. How would Heavenly Father have me be to my sister that is struggling, or hurting...help them really know the savior.

We talked in Stake Conference about leaving the 99 for the 1 lost sheep. wow! Powerful, President Monson spoke to me I feel. What's tough, is that the 1 almost NEVER wants the help...because they have been comfortable where they were at, and they are scared to let others in...because you forget the 1 lost sheep had to let the Shepherd pick her up and carry her back to the flock, she had to want to come back and have the courage and submission and trust to truly except the Shepherd's unwavering love for her specifically that he would leave the 99 and come after her.

Working with so many less actives, it swells my heart. I feel sometimes that it's going to just burst. I've never felt this before. a literal feeling of a swollen heart and I am so grateful to feel it. I Love my mission, I love every second about it. I love my pains and struggles and tears that well up in my eyes so frequently and water my pillow by night for my brothers and sister I long to love and share all that I have with. my invitation would be to reach out to those in need, family, fathers, mothers, teachers, friends, no- bodies, or people that feel like they’re no- bodies. "I the Lord have numbered my sheep and they hear my voice."

I love the Lord, my heart burns when I think of my savior's love for us his brothers and sisters.
I love you; I wish I could stay out here forever!!!!!
I love you, I love you, and I love you

From here to Heaven,
Sister Judkins