letter # 47

February 21, 2011

1 MORE TRANSFER
:D AHAHAH

I'm STAYING IN College Station for another Transfer!!!! My 4th!! I am very blessed to know that. The work is going slowly, but when you work slowly, and if you are precise and loving and you care so much about what you are building, and if you are moving slow enough, you may notice that your hands that are maybe rough and hard from laboring with all your heart, are changing from yours to our dear brother's hands.

How precious and so real is the love our Heavenly Father has given each of us. A part of him, we are children of God, maybe this is why my heart breaks and tears wet my pillow at night for my beloved family out here in Texas, and why Satan tries so hard to replace those feelings with anger, malice, begrudging feelings that make us feel alone. Satan's whole goal is to separate us from that Love our Heavenly father has for us and our savior has for us, in which he suffered pain and death by such pain-staking ways. Oh the Joy this sentence gives "I know that my Redeemer lives". He loves me....do you know that?

My heart is so full, that my eyes are filled with hot tears as I write to you as I wear my name badge and realize how much our savior knows us. And has suffered every pain we have felt. I have had the burden and privilege to feel some of my brothers and sisters feelings. And how painful it must have been for Jesus Christ to suffer every hard ship and every hurt heart and every abused women and child. "Knowing you'll come home again, is worth the price of pain" my heart aches for those to know the truth, and for those that are still struggling that know and follow the truth. How painful it is to watch their eyes fill with tears because this life was not guarantied to be happy. And some will enter and leave this world only knowing pain and suffering and will maybe even never have a breath that was not painful. Oh how my heart aches to hold my sisters and brothers that hurt because of a beaten and broken heart they try to hide alone.

Our savior Jesus Christ loves us so incredibly, with out guile. He reaches for us individually and although even his closest friends betrayed him, he will never betray us. even when we tell him we will never turn to him, he would take that and I could imagine tears welling up in his eyes, but how he would say "those times when you felt most alone and you asked for me to come, those were the moments in your life when there was only one footprint in the sand, that was the moment I carried you". How often he will carry us, kicking and screaming and cursing him, because we don't think he is there. And every time we punch, he takes it.

"I felt his touch, he wiped away my tears, and with his gentle hand began to silence all my fears." he paid the price of true and perfect love. I cannot say how grateful I am.

We received a referral and went to them within 24 hours. The Vigil family. A family of 6. They are incredibly sweet. And they want to be together as a family. What a gift to know that families can be together forever! The mom is the only one that doesn’t' really understand English so well. They are Hispanic!!! SO COOL! we taught them that night with a member and it was very jumbled, but the spirit was strong and we met the dad later, (who wasn't at the 1st lesson, and he is really catholic, but he was very nice and receptive, and they said they will all be home today for our meeting) They are choice children of Heavenly Father and I'm excited to tell you what happens with them.

The Brown Family (Byron) canceled on us this week, but we are praying he is still hungry for more of the spirit.

We are teaching Shirley again! She is struggling. "I feel that after my husband died that I have no purpose". She has been to church many times, and believes everything, but doesn't have a testimony of Joseph Smith yet. She is truly special and prepared.

We are working hard on referrals from our ward and building and strengthening the ward with each other reaching out and loving each other and serving. To serve is powerful! I hope you all feel that and serve people that are close to you. Don’t forget FAMILY, serve family, they need it just as much as the lonely ward member. Don’t forget each other. I'm sorry to say this has been a hard thing for me to learn and I am so sorry family for not being there and trying harder to love and serve you. Sometimes we forget that our family needs some cookies sometimes, or a heart attack, or a hug and a few minutes or an hour of our time to sit and listen and let them lean on our shoulder and cry. It’s hard that are closest loved ones sometimes get the worst of are attitudes and love. Or lack of love and service.

I love you each so sincerely. I love the work the Lord invites and asks each of us to perform in our lives. I love serving; I love to know my savior trusts me with feeling my brothers and sister and being able to touch them with the spirit. I love the mission of the church! The church is true; it's powerful to know families can be together forever, because God loves us he has restored his power and Scripture to help us know just how we can be together forever! Oh what joy I feel, my heart has been physically pained the passed 2 days with the overwhelming love and trust God puts in his children that are obedient and willing to receive. mom, dad, Tasha, June, Grace, Peter, Josh, Erica, Aiden, Brody, Jac, Megan, Jacen, Page, Jill, David, Lydia, Claire, John, Joe, Julie, Jed, Grandma. I love each of you with all my heart. I want to be together forever. Look at that full line of names and future ones will be added. This is MY family. I want each of you with me, and I want to be with you! The day I see all of us in the temple together for my future sealing will be the day I look at those eternity mirrors and I will see all you with me! Thank you!

Jac thank you for giving me a priesthood blessing before I left to see dad at the hospital. I've been meaning to tell you how powerful I felt your love, and the power of Heavenly Father's words he spoke through you. Thank you for being worthy Jac.

I miss you.

-Love from here to Home
-Sister Judkins